While sitting at a coffeshop, a relatively cute guy voiced his approval of my Back To The Future 2 hat. A few minutes later, he was sitting across from me. Hands at his sides, sort of twitching his head (because I attract winners).
Guy: Sorry. The inside of my ears itch, and I don’t know how to make it stop.
Me: Did you lose your fingers in a freak fisting accident.
Guy: There are fisting accidents that you wouldn’t describe as freak?
Maybe I do attract winners.