Random Loiterer: “I only play The Lottery when it gets over $500 Million. I’m not stupid.”
Me: “So, you just put your money in when you have the least statistical chance to win?”
Me: “Well, the higher the jackpot, the more people buy tickets, the less the chances are that you’ll win anything.”
RL: “Huh. Well. I guess I never thought about it like that.”
He walks halfway out the door, stops, swivels around and asks “Could I borrow a dollar?”
I’m standing by the back issue bins when a woman walks into the store. She looks at my shirt, smiles and begins creeping he way toward me.
"Do not even think about pinching me." I say, with no humor in my voice.
"You’re not wearing green." She says.
"I’m not. That doesn’t mean you can pinch me."
"You don’t like The Irish?" She asks.
"I am of Irish descent." I reply. "But I didn’t feel like wearing green today. Are you Irish?"
She laughs. ”Everyone’s Irish on St. Patrick’s Day.”
"Are you also a tree on Arbor Day?"
She frowns. ”Excuse me?”
"If you don’t magically turn into a tree on Arbor Day, you are also not magically Irish on St. Patrick’s Day. "