Random Dude: "It's too bad you're not a bottom. We could have fun."
Me: "Such is life."
RD: "What are you doing tonight? Want to hook up?"
Me: "I'm working. And we don't appear to be a match."
RD: "We could meet where you work. Hawt."
Me: "Not really. I'm a security guard at a museum."
RD: "Museum sex. Hawt."
Me: "I work at the Museum Of Screaming Babies in the Used Diaper Wing."
RD: "LOL. Where really?"
Me: "Are you calling me a liar?"
RD: "Museum Of Science?"
Me: "No. We don't experiment on babies. That would be cruel."
Me: "Although that might explain the screaming."
Me: "Oh my god. Do I work at a baby torturing museum?"
Me: "I'm sorry. I have to go and reevaluate my life decisions now. Thanks for the chat."