On my way to lunch, a guy stops and says, “You look really familiar.”
I say “We went on a date once.”
He says “And you didn’t call me back. jerk.” but he’s smiling.
I say “You asked me to take you to Friendly’s on our date. You then put a hair in your ice cream, demanded to speak to the manager, spent fifteen minutes flirting with the manager while trying to get our meal comped, got our meal comped, spent an additional ten minutes talking to the bewildered manager about porn, borrowed five dollars from me to buy some pastries on the walk to our separate houses, and when I saw you a week later, you made eye contact, smiled, and walked quickly away. No, I did not call you back.”
He says “To be fair…”
I say “I have no fairness in me today. Bye.”
Then I bought a cupcake and watched some TV.
This has been a strange day.