Cute straight boys, nerdy punk rock animé haired boys, drunk bisexuals with tongue rings, Progaine Shampoo, key theft, butt grabbers, Livejournal, fetishism, Celeste, and Mortimer Velociraptor; the first part of this story was written for an Archie McPhee contest for embarrassing dating stories. I won. The final portion of the story won the hearts of Livejournal fans, as their favorite Insafemode Journal entry of 2004. I have altered it a bit, for continuity's sake, and because I hated it.
The convention mentioned is, yes, the 2003 National Poetry Slam. Also, there is a line that ended up in Drunken Conversations At Hampshire College.
Also, the chair I was using squeaks periodically. I was not harboring a duck fugitive.
Featuring Saint, David, Celeste, Mortimer Velociraptor, and a bunch of people you will never hear about again.
Intro Music: The Revenge Of The Nerd Song
Incidental Music: "The Geeks Were Right" by The Faint
Incidental Music: "What What In The Butt" by Samwell
Outro Music: "Shut Your Mouth" by Garbage
Away at boarding school, our protagonist is hit by love from a couple of different angles. Will he hit back?
Featuring Jennifer, Beckee, JBob, and Victor.
Intro music: "27 Jennifers" by Mike Doughty
Incidental music: "Touch-a-Touch-a-Touch-a-Touch me" from The Rocky Horror Picture Show
Incidental music: "Dumb" by The Beautiful South
Outro music: "All Apologies (Unplugged)" by Nirvana
A boy discovers his sexuality via pornography, video games, and The Wall Street Journal.
Featuring Kevin Harris, Jeremy Burdick, Jennifer, Treacherous Scott, my family
Intro Music: "Where's Waldo Theme" by Jeff Barry
Outro Music: "Busted" by The Isley Brothers (featuring P.S.)