Growing up as a kid who did a lot of theatre and choirs, I learned to hate Christmas music. I don't mind singing it, and if there was, say three days out of the year where the songs were prevalent, I would probably love them. But those Poor Me We're So Discriminated Against Christians push their shitty, forgettable spirituals on us for an entire month of the year and it sucks.
It's great if you like that kind of schmaltz, but for those of us who are just trying to grab a Lyft to work, we don't want to hear the Destiny's Child forty-five minute Christmas Medley, or the trap remix of The Twelve Days Of Christmas. I stopped buying Christmas gifts for people because I can't stand going into stores where they being blasting "Holiday Music" (99% Christian) before Thanksgiving even rolls around.
For the last couple of years, I've had friends play The Little Drummer Boy Challenge, where you try and see if you can make it from Thanksgiving to Christmas Eve without hearing a single ba-rum-pum-pum. This year, I also saw Whamageddon making the rounds, which is a more specific challenge: make it from Thanksgiving to christmas Eve without hearing Wham's recording of "Last Christmas".
I'm not linking any of these songs because I care about you.
Well, for at least eleven months of the year, the Christmas music is largely irrelevant, but surely there's That One Song you can't stand that seems to follow you around. What is that song? How did you come to hate it? What's the worst time you have associated with it? Is there a good time associated with it? How would you discuss that song with the person who wrote it or made it famous?
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