I didn't give up on drinking
I quit without notice but some nights I stop by and help empty a glass or two I don't think I've hurt anyone drunk that I didn't also hurt sober I drank to have ice to swish to land a barb not to impair my judgement not to forget I'm a cruel sober Now I drink soda with hipster accoutrements which I also did when I was still drinking alcohol I guess I haven't changed much apart from spending less money in bars I stopped drinking often when I met my last love who doesn't drink Like me For no regretful reason And yet I don't remember ever meeting anyone in bars that I wanted to take home or to accompany to their sordid apartment I don't know how anything connects anymore I fear it's because I'm a stupid sober That I need a slight haze of chemical depression to understand how life works I really am a stupid sober to look back at the forgetful drunk I used to be And wish I could get that feeling back
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