One of my favorite types of e-mails is
We would like you to organize this show for us, using these specific guidelines that don't seem to mesh with your work or your work ethic. We need you to first work at creating a description of your event, find multiple readers to feature, set up an open mic, secure a location, and set a date. Please make sure your event will run smoothly. It should be family-friendly and free. Because why should people pay to experience art? Isn't it all about getting your work out there? Make sure to do the proper promotion and marketing to secure an audience. If the show goes well, we MIGHT deign to pay you for you this work. But probably not. We can give you a fun little title, though.
----Sent from the desk of someone who is paid well to ask artists to do work for free