If we know each other in real life, or if we are friends on social media, you know I am a huge fan of Doctor Who, in general. I'm critical of parts of it, but, for the most part, as long as I don't see  Mark Gatiss's name as the writer of an episode, I go into it with an open mind.

I was incredibly excited for the Thirteenth Doctor. I like Jodie Whitaker as an actor, and I enjoyed the first season of Chris Chibnall's Broadchurch (I haven't seen the other seasons).

I, uh. I don't love it. I love Jodie Whitaker as The Doctor. I love some of the risks they've taken in the interest in writing a more progressive series. I like the idea of the companions. But ... I haven't been able to finish an honest Twelfth Season comprised only of episodes that I like. Chibnall's take on the characters is Super Clunky. His companions are rarely given enough  time to be interesting, and his Doctor takes a whole season to figure out who she is, which didn't work when Moffat/Capaldi tried it a few years ago, and it didn't work for Chibnall/Whittaker.

But in November 2019, I started rewatching the modern Doctor Who episodes with my partner. And I used this series of blog posts as a guide. It's been great, and helpful. I had made some mistakes in episode selection when I created the original list, and we would watch a Not So Great episode, talk about why it didn't work, and then I'd find an episode that I'd previously left off, and update the list. I stand by the current incarnation of this list.

Except this post. This post will start off well, but it will get mired in continuity episodes, which I usually would skip out on except...there aren't enough episodes yet, so I needed to flesh them out.

This list may disappear almost entirely when Russel T Davies comes back, and, fingers crossed, returns the show to its previous glory. But for now, here's my suggesting for getting completely caught up with modern who, featuring the new awesome Doctor, her mediocre companions, The Best New Character In The 21st Century, and her inconsistent writing staff which is led by the worst showrunner in the sixty year history of the show.

Episode 1: The Woman Who Fell To Earth
(13,  Ryan, Yasmin, Graham, Grace, Tim Shaw)
64 minutes

The Doctor: "Why are you calling me madam?"
Yasmin Khan: "Because… you’re a woman?"
The Doctor: "Am I? Does it suit me?"
Yasmin Khan: "What?"
The Doctor: "Oh yeah, I remember – sorry, half an hour ago I was a white-haired Scotsman!"
​
It's a whole new Doctor. This one, a goofy steampunk engineer is an absolute delight. She spends most of this episode trying to figure out who she is, and why some tooth-stealing alien is killing humans.


Episode 2: Demons Of The Punjab
(13, Yasmin, Ryan, Graham, Nani Umbreen, Thijarians)
50 minutes

As a favor to Yasmin, The Doctor and crew head to Partition era Pakistan to learn about Nani Umbreen (Yasmin's grandmother)'s past. Of course there are aliens involved. It's Doctor Who. But there are some great misdirects, interesting historical notes, and significantly less whitewashing than most Doctor Who historical episodes. While you may learn a lot, and there are certainly political notes, this feels more like a character driven story with political mesasages than a political statement that they wrapped a plot around. It is my second favorite episode of this season.


Episode 3: KERBLAM!
(13, Ryan,  Graham, Yasmin, Judy, Dan, Kerblam Deliverymen)
49 minutes

It's Amazon Dot Com in the future! Fewer humans. More robots. Less humanity. This was the first episode of Whittaker's reign that felt like a fun, classic Doctor Who scrape. 
 

Episode 4 : Spyfall
(13, Yasmin, Ryan, Graham, The Master,  Daniel Barton, The Kasaavin)
120 minutes

An alien race is killing international spies indiscriminately. The companions realize that they really don't know anything about The Doctor. The Master is back. The fictional version of Google is run by a truly evil fuck (no, not The Master). Plus important female historical figures serve as temporary companions when The Doctor is separated from her more boring, contemporary companions. The new Master is fantastic in this serial.


Episode 5: Nikola Tesla's Night Of Terror
(13, Yasmin, Ryan, Graham, Skithra)

There have been some great comics and stories about the two warring 20th century genius inventors: Thomas Edison and Nikola Tesla. Edison is, according to history, justifiably cast as the villain in most of these stories. Here, too. This is just a fun, one-off historical story, which have become rare as the 21st century of the show has matured.


Episode 6: The Fugitives Of The Judoon
(13, #?, Ryan, Graham, Yasmin, Jack Harkness, The Judoon)
50 minutes

Vinay Patel is far and away the best writer from Chibnall's era of Who. Having also written "The Demons Of Punjab", this episode, reintroduces The Judoon, introduces a new Doctor, and brings back a companion we haven't seen since the end of our Season 9. Everything about this episode is perfect. I loved it even before the returning companion. And well before the reveal of the new Doctor, but those other notes helped this episode climb to My Absolute Favorite Chibnall-era Who episode.


Episode 7: War Of The Sontarans
(13,  Yasmin, Dan, Swarm, Azure, Kavanista, Passenger, Vinder, Sontarans)
​
This is technically the second part of a six episode storyarc, but it's not only stronger than the first part, it's much more interesting if you haven't seen the first part. The Doctor and her companions (one of whom is new) have become unstuck in time and are locked out of the TARDIS. And history is unglued, as historical Earth events have been interspersed with familiar Doctor Who aliens. And several mysterious new lifeforms are also trying to fix the timeline.

Episode 8: Village Of The Angels
(13, Yasmin, Dan, Azure, Bel, Passenger, Weeping Angels)

When I started including the 2021 episodes in the continuity, I pulled out five not very good episodes from 2019 that led up to "The Timeless Child". I already wasn't enjoying Chibnall's run, but I thought Chibnall was an Idea Writer who wasn't good at execution.  There are many of them in comics. I can see their intentions and their world-building concepts, and their sense of characters but they lack the ability to translate that into dialogue and plotting. I thought that was Chibnall's flaw. He structured his entire second season of Doctor Who to answer a question posed in "The Brain Of Morbius", which was the first episode of this website's Season Three. It didn't need an answer, but it was an intriguing concept. It was just also a confusing mess. Chibnall writes like a fan of the series who lacks any understanding of what makes the show work. He's not an Idea Writer, he's a Fanfic Writer. I am hoping that when Russel T Davies takes over the show, the pre-credit teaser to the very first episode is an homage to Bobby Ewing's return to Dallas, and we find out it was all a fever dream? Whose? Jo Grant's Doctor. Let Davies give Grant a whole new back story who had a dream she was ... *a spoiler would go here* ...

I hope the series gets to a point where I can erase this episode, too. It's not very good, but it's significantly better than parts 1, 3, 5 and 6 of Flux, which are incoherent nonsense with a dull thud of a finish. There's at least a coherent plot in this episode, even if it is Incredibly Stupid and contains a reveal that falls somewhere between laughable and a solid reason to stop watching the show forever. Yes, this episode includes The Weeping Angels, and no it's not going to make you enjoy their presence.  

Episode 9: Eve Of The Daleks
(13, Yaz,  Dan, Daleks)

This whacky time loop episode with two human guest stars and Daleks is a perfect antithesis to the horrible clusterflux of the previous season. It's silly in an endearing way.

******

Alternate take:

When I started including the 2021 episodes in the continuity, I pulled out five not very good episodes from 2019 that led up to "The Timeless Child". Unfortunately, the Timeless Child was a horrible mess. It answered questions by posing dozens, if not hundreds more, most revolving around How Could A Capable Writer Think This Was Going To Be A Good Idea? "Flux" made "The Timeless Child" seem like a masterpiece. While The Timeless Child began with some really good episodes, "Spyfall" and "Fugitive Of The Judoon", and then deteriorated into a narrative stew concocted by an amateur Top Chef contestant who was given too many variables to play with, "Flux" began with a confusing mess, seemed to get a handle on it, and then completely fell apart in the service of End Of The Episode Cliffhanger Moments which are intended to be shocking, but are eye rollingly terrible. It's really a shame that Jodie Whittaker, who is a blast when given coherent scripts and a narrative purpose, has been wasted on what is easily the worst era in the history of the program. I feel worse for her than I do for Colin Baker, because she has to be saddled with misogynist fans who think the problem is diversity and having The Doctor portrayed by a woman, when the real problem is the show is being written by an incompetent white man with good intentions who just doesn't have the skill or talent to support his job as Showrunner.

I created the Doctor Who In Significantly Fewer Episodes list several years ago, in response to a Facebook request about how to watch the series without Watching The Entire Series. I even watched much of the abbrevriated seasons that I created myself, and thought they were great.

In late 2019, I started dating someone who wanted to see Doctor Who without having to watch The Entire Series, and took it as an additional experiment to see if my order worked. We didn't make it far into the classic series before he tuned out. The episodes are Super Long (they're all serials that end up being movie length or LoTR movie length) and they're, you know, mid-twentieth century sci-fi, so you have to be either really nostalgic or in the proper mood.

When we moved into the modern era, he got really into it. Although, like me, he's a completist, and wanted to watch All Of The Episodes. Until we watched two that weren't on my list. Now he's okay with just watching the good stuff. And, for the most part, my list has held up. But I have added and dropped a few episodes for clearer story structure, and I've also removed some episodes because, apart from sentimental moments, they didn't really hold up as well I remembered.

It's still a very subjective list, but one that, I believe, makes a great condensed series of Doctor Who episodes.

Here are the basics everyone should know before getting involved: The show is about an alien time traveler. He takes companions, almost always humans, with him as he explores time and space. The companions change frequently, and in this series format, you sometimes get no closure. You might love a particular companion in one episode, and, in the next, they've been replaced by people you have no context for. Also, when The Doctor gets very ill, his appearance changes. By which, I mean, he is portrayed by an entirely different actor.  This is a cool concept, but it can be jarring at first. It will happen Fourteen Times over the course of these twelve seasons.

Last season was all about grief and getting over the terrible things you've done in life. We met Clara, several times, we wondered who she was, we found out, we moved on, The Doctor regenerated, he was cranky, Clara has started to decranky him, we moved on. This season follows their adventures together, and features one of the most fun multiple Time Lord stories in the show's history.

Episode 1: The Girl Who Died
(12, Clara, Ashilde, The Maya)
45 minutes

The Doctor. Clara. Aliens. Time travel. Death. The usual. Surely there will be no consequences spinning out of this perfectly fine, but not remarkably interesting episode.


Episode 2: The Zygon Invasion
(12, Clara, Osgood, Kate Stewart, Zygons)
90 minutes

It's a reunion for pretty much all the non-Timelord characters (except The Doctor) from "Day Of The Doctor". Have The Zygons broken their treaty with humanity? Will companions and beloved recurring characters die? (Wait, didn't one or two of them die in "Death In Heaven"? I guess not Very Much.) It's all sorts of mistaken identity hijinks with the greatest doppelganger aliens in the franchise.


Episode 3: Face The Raven
(12, Clara, Ashilde, Rigsy, Judoon, Ood, Ice Warriors, Silurians, Cybermen, Sontarans)
45 minutes

Oh, hey, it's that immortal young woman from the series premiere! She has her own place now, and seems to be running it very well. She's clearly up to something that doesn't involve The Doctor and...OH SHIT. EVERYTHING GOES WRONG. SO VERY VERY WRONG. 


Episode 4: Heaven Sent
(12)
45 minutes

For the first time since the inception of the series, this episode features almost no one except The Doctor. He is being menaced by...something, but this is ALL Peter Capaldi as The Doctor on his own trying to figure out where he is, and if he can undo the events of the previous episodes. In my opinion, it's one of the best episodes in the history of the series.


Episode 5: Hell Bent
(12, Clara, Timelords, Sisterhood of Karn, Rassilon, Daleks, Weeping Angels, Cybermen)
45 minutes

The Doctor is Very Cross about the last two episodes, and goes to Gallifrey to make The Time Lord Assholes suffer. Previous villains abound, as The Doctor Shall Have His Revenge.


Episode 6: Husbands Of River Song
(12, River, Nardole)
60 minutes

During the holiday special a couple of seasons ago, The Eleventh Doctor married River Song. It's all very wibbly-wobbly-timey-wimey. Well, this version of The Doctor runs into River on her own adventure, and she is married to...perhaps several other people. Don't worry, there's no slut shaming, or pro or anti polygamy stances taken. It's just that The Doctor is desperate for River Song to recognize him, and she has no idea who he is.


Episode 7: Pilot
(12, Bill, Nardole, Heather, Daleks)
45 minutes

The Doctor seems to have retired to Earth to become a college professor. Another staff member realizes there's something very unusual about him, and decides to get involved in his life. Thus, he gets involved in hers, and, voila, meet the new companion, Bill.


Episode 8: Smile
(12, Bill, Nardole, Vardy)
45 minutes

The Doctor and Bill go to a human colony on another planet where something has gone wrong. This is actually what seems to happen on every companion's second adventure with The Doctor, but I've skipped all the rest of them because they weren't very good. This one, involving some creepy emoji robots, is a fun little adventure.


Episode 9: Oxygen
(12, Bill, Nardole)
45 minutes

The Doctor and Bill go to space! Capitalism is bad! Space future is tough! The Doctor is good! Bill is human! Capitalism is bad! Space adventures are fun!


Episode 10: Extemis
(12, Bill, Nardole, Missy,The Monks)
45 minutes

The last episode ended with what seems like a radical change for The Doctor going forward. But he needs to fix that change, while not letting Bill know it has taken place. Meanwhile The Vatican has asked The Doctor to read a text that causes all humans that read it to end their own lives. This is part of a trilogy that we won't come back to. And the A story is just kind of okay. But the B story brings Missy back into the fold, and that's definitely worth the watch.


Holiday Special: World Enough And Time / The Doctor Falls
145 minutes
(12, Bill, Nardole, Missy, The Master, Cybermen)

It's the final part of Steven Moffat's era of Doctor Who. Will Missy continue her journey to be a good person when she's literally confronted by her past in the form of her previous incarnation, The Master? Is Bill Pots the first Cyberman? Are we stuck with Nardole for much longer? (He really is The Worst.) Is The Twelfth Doctor seriously going to regenerate into The First Doctor again? I guess it would be kind of cool if the whole series ended up being cyclical. Right?

A few years ago, I was asked to come up with a Doctor Who In 50 Episodes List on Facebook. For people who wanted to get really into the series without getting Super Really Into The Series.  With over fifty years worth of episodes, the prospect of becoming a fan of Doctor Who can be completely daunting.

I've compiled this list of episodes that I like, so it's very subjective. I have tried to make it so that there is a rough arc to the seasons. I don't give a fuck about episodes that are historically important, this is a guide intended to make you Like The Series, not be an Expert On The Series.

Here are the basics you should know: The show is about an alien time traveler. He takes companions, almost always humans, with him as he explores time and space. The companions change frequently, and in this guide, you sometimes get no closure. You might love a particular companion in one episode, and, in the next, they've been replaced by people you have no context for. Also, when The Doctor gets very ill, his appearance changes. By which, I mean, he is portrayed by an entirely different actor.  This is a cool concept, but it can be jarring at first. It will happen Fourrteen Times over the course of these twelve seasons.

Last season we saw the end of Torchwood's story arc, the satisfying and optimistic end of Amy & Rory's time with The Doctor. This season should be a clean slate of adventuring with no continuity or storyarcs hanging over The Doctor's head except for his own. Ahhhh, glorious new beginnings.

Episode 1: Asylum Of The Daleks
​(11, Amy, Rory, Clara, Daleks)
45 minutes

It turns out that we're not done with Rory & Amy yet, and their lives have turned Bleak. And full of Daleks. The Doctor is reunited with his former companions by a Congress of Daleks who need The Doctor to go to the surface of Skaro, their home planet, and save them from their own maddest Daleks. It turns out, due to the whole cracks in time thing from Season Eight, they don't appear to have any idea who he is. And that's not the biggest surprise in this episode.


Episode 2: Angels Take Manhattan
(11, Amy, Rory, River, Weeping Angels)
45 minutes

Rory, Amy, and their precocious time-traveling daughter River Song get sucked into mid-twentieth century Earth where The Weeping Angels are seriously fucking up the timeline. I'm sure their involvement will mean everything ends up a-ok, and no one will be sad.


Episode 3: The Snowmen
(11, Clara, Vastra, Flint, Strax, The Great Intelligence)
60 minutes

The Doctor has gone all broody sadsack again, and he's living in the nineteenth century with The Paternoster gang, occasionally helping them solve mysteries. But a giant mystery in the form of Soufle girl from "Asylum of The Daleks" lands in his path, and he must discover how this Impossible Girl has come back into his life.


Episode 4: The Bells Of Saint John
(11, Clara, Great Intelligence)
45 minutes

Clara is alive. Again. And in modern times. Someone gave her The Doctor's number, and now he is determined not to let her die again again. The main plot of the episode involving wifi is on the extra cheesy side, but this is a good introduction to Clara in her finalish form. And it fits into a smooth, if not very interesting, Great Intelligence arc.


Episode 5: Name Of The Doctor
(11, War Doctor, Clara, River, Vastra, Flint, Strax, Great Intelligence, Whisper Men)
45 minutes

The Doctor, Clara, The Paternoster Gang, and River Song all end up on Trenzalore, which is where The Doctor is said to be buried.  The Great Intelligence, from the last two episodes, need the Doctor's name so they can go into the timestream and wreak havoc on The Doctor's timeline. We also find out why Clara is The Impossible Girl, which was a huge, exhausting, and complex season long storyarc if you were watching all the episodes she appeared in, but distilled down to the three episodes in this continuity is a satisfying, fun mystery.


Episode 6: The Day Of The Doctor
(10, 11, War Doctor, 4, Clara, Bad Wolf, Osgood, Kate Stewart, Elizabeth, Zygons, Daleks, Time Lords)
77 minutes

Waaaaaay back in Season Six, there started to be allusions to The Time War, a big terrible battle between Time Lords and Daleks that fucked up the entire universe. Since then, we've seen The Daleks a bunch of times, but only had to deal with Those Asshole Time Lords (apart from The Master) once. Welllll, welcome to The Time War. It's going to take three of The Doctors to figure out how to save Gallifrey and undo the damage they did in The Time War originally. Or...hold up...is THIS the damage they did in the Time War that they've been grumbling about? Unlike classic multi-Doctor episodes, we don't get every Doctor showing up with one of their companions to fill us with nostalgia, but there are some surprise cameos, including The Zygons, who we've not seen since Season Two.

Episode 7: Time Heist
(12, Clara, Danny)
45 minutes

WOAH THERE! This time The Doctor really did regenerate offscreen? For our purposes, yes. There was actually an episode after Day Of The Doctor where we see The Doctor regenerate into this new face, but it is FUCKEN AWFUL, and we don't have time for that crap. We're also mainly skipping over the whole The Doctor has a new face and doesn't know how to be who he used to be, how will we ever get used to him. We're launching right into an adventure where The Doctor and Clara have to rob a bank or else be slaughtered by the bankers. Weird twists abound!


Episode 8: The Caretaker
(12, Clara, Danny, Missy, Seb)

The Doctor goes Deep Undercover. In the school where Clara and Danny work. Which just so happens to be the school that Barbara and Ian worked out way way way way way back in Season One.  Nothing unusual could ever happen there. Also, The Doctor and Danny get along about as well as The Doctor and Mickey, or The Doctor and Rory.


Episode 9: Dark Water/Death In Heaven
(12, Clara, Kate Stewart, Osgood, Danny, Missy, Seb, Cybermen) 
90 minutes

Clara's got a boyfriend! Clara's got a boyfriend! Annnnnnd, he's dead. Sad Clara and Cantankerous The Doctor go to the afterlife to find out what happened to him, and end up running into Cybermen and an old foe with a new face. You're not the only one who can regenerate, Doctor face.


Episode 10: The Magician's Apprentice/The Witch's Familiar
(12, Clara, Kate Stewart, Missy, Davros, Daleks)
​90 minutes

Clara ends up teaming up with The Doctor's foe from the last episode in order to survive Davros and The Daleks. This episode actually reaches all the way back to an off-hand remark from "Genesis Of The Daleks" to explain why The Doctor didn't just kill All The Daleks and put an end to this millennia ago (although I guess he did, temporarily, in The Time War, but we've dealt with that already, get over it).


Holiday Special: Under The Lake/Before The Flood
(12, Clara, Tivolans)
90 minutes

The Doctor, Clara, and...ghosts...under water? It's another adventure where The Doctor tries to save a bunch of people from something he doesn't understand. And Clara is trying to get this The Doctor to be less cantankerous. He is, seriously, Colin Baker/William Hartnell rude, not at all the modern Doctor we had gotten used to. Maybe solving this mystery will make him more agreeable. Probably not.

Serial 1: Children Of Earth
(Jack, Gwen, Ianto, Rhys, Frobisher, The 456)
5 episodes, total of 225 minutes

Yikes. What do you do when ALL the children on the planet stop moving at the same time, and start delivering, in unison, a message from aliens? What do you do if you're a government who knows who these aliens are and what they want? What do you do when those aliens want 10% of the children left on the planet, or they will kill everyone?

This miniseries is Dark As Hell. And even though there was another miniseries, this serves as a perfect ending point for the Torchwood series, and is, as mentioned in the season description, one of the best things to ever come out of the Doctor Who franchise.


Episode 6: The Doctor's Wife
(11, Amy, Rory)
45 minutes

Returning to The Doctor's adventures, we're reunited with Amy and Rory as The Doctor is called to an unknown planet. Is it possible that other Time Lords have survived the Time War? Welllllll, maybe, but this is mainly the story of The Doctor and one of the most important parts of his life that we often see, but which is rarely addressed.


Serial 3: The Rebel Flesh/The Almost People
(11, Amy, Rory, Gangers, Madame Kovarian)
90 minutes

The Doctor, Amy & Rory end up in a the nearish future where Not Autons but kind of sort of Autons are created to keep humans from getting killed in industrial accidents. Of course, being a science fiction story, this goes Horribly Wrong, and it's up to The Doctor and his "ganger" (a synthetic duplicate of himself) to teach everyone lessons and save the bloody day.


Episode 8: The Girl Who Waited
(11, Amy, Rory)
45 minutes

If I've learned anything from sitting down and watching Star Trek, it's Never Take Shore Leave, Never Go To The Planet Where Everything's Fine And Go Hang Out At The Water Park Or The Laser Tag Planet Or Whatever, because something there has gone horribly awry, or there is a serial killer there, or both. This is a particularly devastating character study episode where things sort or turn out fine in the end, and yet its resolution is still emotionally gutting.


Serial 9: The Good Man Goes To War/Demon's Run
(11, Amy, Rory, River, Vastra, Flint, Strax, Mme Kovarian, Maldovar, Headless Monks, Cybermen)
55 minutes

A cult called The Headless Monks have been working behind the scenes in the last few episodes and have been seriously messing with one of The Doctor's companions. River Song steps in to help save the day, and finally reveal who she is, and why she keeps popping up along The Doctor's timeline. We also get to watch the founding of The Paternoster Gang.

Episode 10: God Complex 
(11, Amy, Rose, Weeping Angels, Tivolians)
45 minutes

Holy Hell, we're at the end of the season already? Wowsers. The Doctor & Companions end up at a spooky hotel that kills everyone who enters it. Yaaaaaaaay! It's even a labyrinthian hotel, and the thing that kills you is a minotaur. Take that, tropes! Again, it's mostly a character study, and while not quite as devastating as the previous episode, we do say goodbye to Amy & Rory forever, as they end up with one of the most optimistic endings for The Doctor's companions ever.


Holiday Special: The Wedding Of River Song
(11, Amy, Rose, River, Mme Kavorian, Maldovar, The Silence)

This is mostly a resolution of plot points from last season's Holiday Special ("The Impossible Astronaut"/|"Day Of The Moon") and "A Good Man Goes To War". It's also an alternate timeline adventure, so we get to see familiar characters in new and exciting roles. It's not My Favorite Episode by a longshot, but it's a nice coda to the River, Rory and Amy saga from this season.

Serial 1: Silence In The Library/Forest Of The Dead
(10, Donna, River, Vashta Nerada)
90 minutes

The Doctor and Donna are trapped in a library where the shadows are filled with space piranha. But they're rescued by someone from The Doctor's past and future. Unfortunately, he has no idea who she is.
 

Episode 2: Turn Left
(10, Donna, Rose, Wilfred, Sylvia, Trickster)
45 minutes

While The Doctor peruses a flea market, Donna is forced to relive her life as if she had never met The Doctor, thus dooming the world several times over. But one of The Doctor's former companions swoops in to help save the day. For now.


Serial 3: The Stolen Earth/Journey's End
(10, Donna, Rose, Sara Jane, Mickey, Jack, Martha, Gwen, Ianto, K-9, Jackie,Wilfred, Sylvia, Harriet, Luke, Francine, Davros, Daleks)
90 minutes

So much happens in this episode. The Daleks from Doomsday. Davros. Every companion from the modern series, and some from the classic series. Even the woodwork comes out of the woodwork to help The Doctor when the Daleks steal Earth and a variety of other planets in their attempt to kill everything Not Dalek. At the end, all of the companions are dispersed. Now, we've seen companions evicted from the TARDIS, killed by Cybermen, abandoned in alternate dimensions, and returned to the entirely wrong part of England, but this episode gets my vote for most heartbreaking removal of a companion ever. 


Serial 4: The Wedding Of Sarah Jane
(10, Sara Jane, Luke, K-9, Clyde, Trickster)
56 minutes

The Trickster, who was somehow involved in Turn Left, has devised a plot to trap Sarah Jane Smith out of time. Luckily, The Doctor shows up, and he and Sarah Jane's army of children set out to rescue her.


Serial 5: The Waters Of Mars
(10)
60 minutes

Lonely Doctor is usually a scary Doctor. But when he shows up at a Fixed Point In Time, he sticks around to see an important historical moment that he's not allowed to change. This is the last time we'll see 10 this season. I originally had his farewell episode "The End Of Time" on this list, but upon further watching it's pretty terrible. There are some great Goodbye Moments at the every end of the episode, but I think I'd rather graft them on at the beginning of the next episode than make someone sit through the confusing and disappointing final moments of 10.


Episode 6: The Eleventh Hour
(11, Amy, Rory, Prisoner Zero, Atraxi)
45 minutes

The new face of The Doctor is the youngest yet, and he encounters a young girl with cracks in her wall that do not sit well with him. How is he going to fix this?


Episode 7: The Hungry Earth/Cold Blood
(11, Amy, Rory, Silurians)
90 mins

The Doctor and his new companions' vacation in Rio turns into a mining hill disaster when a drill reaches further beneath the Earth's surface than anything has ever gone before, and ends up disturbing a classic Doctor Who species. Also, that pesky crack in the wall appears to be ... following them. 


Episode 8: Vincent & The Doctor
(11, Amy, Vincent, Krafayis)
45 minutes

The Doctor and Cracks In The Wall Girl (now a woman) go back and visit a depressed Vincent Van Gogh. There are some alien shenanigans, for sure, but this episode is about being human, and trying to help the mentally ill. It's excellent.


Episode 9: The Lodger
(11, Amy, Craig, Silence)
45 minutes

Separated from Cracks In The Wall Girl, The Doctor moves in with the Carpool Karaoke Guy (no, really), and completely ruins James Corden's life by trying to be a decent human being and a good friend.  Also, aliens kill a bunch of people.


Serial 10: The Pandorica Opens/The Big Bang
(11, Amy, Rory, River, Vincent, Daleks, Cybermen, Judoon, Cybermen , Sontarans)
90 minutes

Soooo...about those cracks in the wall. It turns out. Maaaaaaybe. Possibly they're The Doctor's fault. And a whole mess of alien villains (The Cybermen, The Daleks, The Sontarans, and The Judoon to name a few) have to stop The Doctor before he destroys all of time. Oh, and that lady from the library is back to help him out. She's way more of a badass than he is, sweety.


Holiday Special: The Impossible Astronaut
(11, Amy, Rory, River, The Silence)

Along with The Weeping Angels and River Song, The Silence are one of the coolest things Steven Moffat introduced to The Doctor Who Universe. He built a whole season around them. Unfortunately, the season is mostly terrible and unsatisfying. But their first appearance is creepy, and worth a look. Plus, this episode sets up some interesting problems for Amy and Rory going forward.

Interseason Special, Episode 0: The Runaway Bride
(10, Donna, Wilfred, Sylvia, Racnoss)

Modern Doctor Who regularly (but not consistently) presents a Christmas or New Year's Special between seasons. We're going to take a page out of this book to give you the adventures of The Doctor and Donna Noble, who showed up in the TARDIS at the end of last season. We get an explanation, an adventure, and The Most Over The Top Villain so far in the series. It's really not one of the greatest episodes ever, but it makes Donna's abrupt appearance later this season much more fun.

Episode 1: Everything Changes
(Jack, Gwen, Ianto, Owen, Tashiko, Suzie, Rhys, Andy, Weevils)
50 minutes

A Welsh detective stumbles on to an alien conspiracy involving Jack Harkness, The Doctor's companion, who we last saw in "The Parting Of Ways". He has an elite team of alien fighters, and a drug called Retcon that can wipe people's memories. I'm sure this will end well.


Episode 2: They Keep Killing Suzie
(Jack, Gwen, Ianto, Owen, Tashiko, Suzie)
53 minutes

Now that The Welsh Detective is a part of Torchwood, she has to use one of their sciencey toys to resurrect a dead former teammate to solve a series of grisly murders that all seem to involve Retcon. Somebody done Fucked Up.


Episode 3: Smith & Jones
(10, Martha, Francine, Tish, Leo, Clive, Judoon)
45 minutes

Hey! It's The Doctor again. He's been wandering solo and off the radar for a while, but he's popped over to Earth just in time for some Moon shenanigans, and to meet Doctor Martha Jones. Welcome new companion, may your fate be less depressing than that of your predecessors.


Serial 4: Human Nature/Family Of Blood
(10, Martha, Family Of Blood)
90 minutes

In order to hide from some vindictive aliens, The Doctor has to forget who he is, and live as a human in the days leading up to World War I. Martha lives out the Louis CK routine about how time travel sucks if you're not White. And there's even a little kid who has The Shining.. Can Martha keep John Smith safe, or will she have to reveal to him that he's The Doctor so they can survive The Family Of Blood.


Episode 5: Blink
(10, Martha, Weeping Angels)
45 minutes

One of the best episodes ever. The birth of wibbley-wobbley, timey-wimey, as a regular old non-companion human must defeat a new type of alien menace in order to return the TARDIS to The Doctor and Martha, whom she has never met, but who are trapped somewhere in The Past. 


Serial 6: End Of Days/Utopia
(10, Jack, Martha, Ianto, Owen, Toshiko, Rhys, Andy, The Master, Weevils)
95 minutes

Back at TORCHWOOD, coworkers are hooking up, members of the team are dying, Jack is being even weirder than usual, and The Rift is going slitheenshit. Jack is in the midst of deciding what to do with his team when he hears the TARDIS in the distance, and forces a reunion that sends him, The Doctor, and Martha Jones to The End Of Time, where they stumble on to cannibals, the last humans, and a Classic Villain.


Serial 7: Sound Of Drums/Last Of The Time Lords/Time Crash
(10, 5, Jack, Martha, Francine, Tish, Leo, Clive, The Master, Toclafane)
100 minutes

The Master is  the new Prime Minister. Good going, Doctor. Betchya wish you hadn't fucked over Harriet Jones now. The world is under his command. The Doctor and Jack Harkness are his prisoners, and only Martha Jones can save the world. And when the crisis is over, The Doctor realizes he must travel alone and---Wait A Second -- It's another The Doctor. Will he be his own companion?
​

Serial 8: Planet Of The Ood
(10, Donna, Ood)
45 minutes

The Doctor and his new companion encounter a slave race being sold by humans as "servants". The whole scenario is not okay, and The Doctor and Donna are going to do their best to fix it.


Serial 9: Sontaran Stratagem/The Poison Sky
(10, Donna, Martha, Wilfred, Sylvia, Sontarans)
90 minutes

UNIT, the military outfit that was super prevelant in Season Two, calls The Doctor for help. Well, to be specific, their officer, Martha Jones calls him in. Martha, Donna, and The Doctor have to stop a spoiled rich kid and an invading alien species from destroying the Earth. Classic sci-fi.


Serial 10: The Doctor's Daughter
(10, Donna, Martha, Hath)
45 minutes

During the first season, The Doctor was traveling with his granddaughter, Susan. So, of course, he Must Have a child who created that grandchild. Maybe this is her origin story. Or maybe it's just Donna, Martha, The Doctor, and some baby aliens playing some old-fashioned war games.

Serial 1: Night Of The Doctor/Rose
(9, 8, War Doctor, Rose, Mickey, Jackie, Autons, Sisterhood Of Karn, Daleks)
55 minutes

The foppy Doctor we saw at the end of the last season has aged into a kindly hard-ass. Apparently, there's some war taking place between The Time Assholes and The Daleks, and people are afraid of both of them. After a ship crashes, The Sisterhood Of Karn from Season Three offer The Doctor a chance to become a warrior as he is forced to regenerate into a different face. Flash forward an indeterminate amount of time, and he has regenerated again into a goofy leather jacket wearing guy who ends up on Earth in the 21st century, where the Autons, who we haven't seen since Season Two, are basically retrying their plans from Spearhead In Space, but The Doctor ends up meeting a girl named Rose and her boyfriend as they team up to defend Earth.


Serial 2: Aliens Of London/World War Three
(9, Rose, Mickey, Jackie, Harriet, Slitheen)
90 minutes

Farting aliens trying to take over Earth does not sound like a wonderful premise, but The Doctor and Rose manage to pull it off.  And we meet a plucky member of parliament named Harriet Jones.


Episode 3: Dalek
(9, Rose, Adam, Daleks)
45 minutes

We've seen The Doctor battle multiple armies of Daleks. He was there at the beginning of The Daleks. He has survived So Many Daleks. They were even in that war that keeps getting mentioned. So how bad could just one Dalek be?


Episode 4: The Long Game
(9, Rose, Adam)

TV bad. So bad. TV make Earth humans lazy, dumb, whatever stereotype you've heard. There are several Davies-era episode where this is the theme, while Moffat modernizes it to Internet bad. So bad. This TV bad episode gives us a better look into The Doctor, though, and plants the seed for an even better better look into The Doctor in a future episode.


Serial 5: The Empty Child/The Doctor Dances
(9, Rose, Jack)
90 minutes

It's World War Two and The Doctor and Rose meet a new companion (Jack), a scary little boy, and unpack a weird intergalactic mystery that accidentally threatens the whole world. This episode is fantastic, and has one of the best climactic Doctor quotes of the whole series.


Serial 6: Bad Wolf/Parting Of The Ways
(9, 10, Rose, Jack, Mickey, Jackie, Daleks)
90 minutes

The phrase "Bad Wolf" has been following The Doctor and Rose since they met. When they, along with Jack, travel to the future, they stumble upon what they think it might mean. Oh, and Daleks. They stumble on Daleks. Lots and lots of bloody Daleks. Oh, and TV? Still bad.


Episode 7: The Christmas Invasion
(10, Rose, Mickey, Jackie, Harriet, Sycorax)
60 minutes

The new Doctor's regeneration didn't go well, so while he recuperates, Rose, her mother, her boyfriend, and Harriet Jones must work together to fight off an alien invasion at Christmas. This episode features one of the most Badass Doctor moments near the end of it. Though whether it was necessary or cruel is very debatable.


Episode 8: School Reunion
(10, Rose, Mickey, Sara Jane, K-9, Krilltanes)
45 minutes

Sarah Jane is back? And that stupid tin dog? They're back for hijinks with The Doctor's new crew of Rose and her boyfriend. They battle...Giles from Buffy The Vampire Slayer. And...is he kind of a vampire here? Weeeeeeeeeeird.


Serial 9: Rise Of The Cybermen/Age Of Steel
(10, Rose, Mickey, Jackie, Pete, Cybermen)
90 minutes

Rose has daddy issues. Maybe that's why she ran off into space with a centuries old man. But when the crew accidentally travels to an alternate dimension, she finds her father is alive. Oh, and there are Cybermen EVERYWHERE. While it would be nice, and all, to save this dimension from The Cybermen, the real issue is Can They Ever Get Back To The Dimension They Came From? Well....not all of them.


Serial 10: Army Of Ghosts/Doomsday
(10, Rose, Mickey, Donna, Jackie, Pete, Cybermen, Daleks)
90 minutes

Cybermen AND Daleks? That can't be good. That whole Other Dimension adventure totally destroyed the walls of time...or something...and The Cybermen have broken through and inadvertently released a ship of Daleks from The Time War. And get your hankies ready because Bad Wolf is back, and it means sad times for The Doctor. 

A few years ago, I was asked to come up with a Doctor Who In 50 Episodes List on Facebook. For people who wanted to get really into the series without getting Super Really Into The Series.  With over fifty years worth of episodes, the prospect of becoming a fan of Doctor Who can be completely daunting.

I've compiled this list of episodes that I like, so it's very subjective. I have tried to make it so that there is a rough arc to the seasons. I don't give a fuck about episodes that are historically important, this is a guide intended to make you Like The Series, not be an Expert On The Series.

Here are the basics you should know: The show is about an alien time traveler. He takes companions, almost always humans, with him as he explores time and space. The companions change frequently, and in this guide, you sometimes get no closure. You might love a particular companion in one episode, and, in the next, they've been replaced by people you have no context for. Also, when The Doctor gets very ill, his appearance changes. By which, I mean, he is portrayed by an entirely different actor.  This is a cool concept, but it can be jarring at first. It will happen Thirteen Times over the course of these eleven seasons.

Last season ended with the promise of A Darker Direction. And it's hard to take that too seriously when the new Doctor's costume is so clowny. But this era is a shade darker than Baker's jellybabies and Davison's celery.  This season is filled with Mean Old Asshole Time Lords. And Time Ladies. People, damn it, Time People. I wish some sort of war would wipe them out of space once and for all.

 Serial 1: The Two Doctors
(6, 2, Peri, Jamie, Sontarans)
135 minutes

Usually, a multiple Doctor episode features the most recent faces of The Doctor teaming up to battle something Time Lord related. But this time we go way back to the second face of The Doctor as he and Jamie (remember him?) end up being trapped by Sontarans who are trying to master time travel. It's up to the current face of The Doctor and his shittily-accented companion to rescue them and restore the timeline. Or whatever. It's a grim way to start A Grim Season.



Serial 2: Revelation Of The Daleks
(6, Peri, Davros, Daleks)
90 minutes

It's been a while since the genocidal grey trash cans have bugged The Doctor. So The Supreme Dalek and his army set out to kill The Doctor....yawn. But, oh shit, it's Davros, and his New Even More Perfect (TM) Daleks. They're so dreamy and creamy. Surely a war between two Dalek armies will result in fewer Daleks by the end of it. How could this be a bad thing?


Serial 3: Terror Of The Vervoids (Trial Of A Time Lord)
(6, Mel, Time Lords, Vervoids, Valeyard)
100 minutes

This is part of a season long arc where The Doctor is put on trial by those asshole Time Lords for being un-Time Lord like or some shit. So the framing device is The Doctor in court recounting his un-Time Lord like adventures. It's not a great season. It's not even a good season. But Terror Of The Vervoids introduces a new companion, and focuses more on the adventure with the aliens than on the trial aspect.
​

Serial 4: The Ultimate Foe (Trial Of A Time Lord)
(6, Mel, Glitz, Time Lords, The Master, Valeyard)
55 minutes

It's  the end of the arc that we mostly skipped! Who is The Valeyard? Do we care? Is The Doctor guilty of anything besides not being as much of an asshole as those other asshole Time Lords? Oh, also The Master is in this for some reason? And the trial is in a future that won't ha--look, it's an okay episode, and I didn't want to cut out all of Colin Baker's run, since it's totally not his fault that his era was so blah.


Serial 5: Time And The Rani
(7, Mel, Rani, Tetraps)
100 minutes

New Doctor! Return of one of them there evil Time Lo-- Time La-- Time People! This is the second episode in a row where I'll admit, it's Not A Great episode. But there wasn't much to choose from. Low budgets, mediocre writers, no real direction to the seasons, except the heavy handed Trial Of A Timelord. We don't even get to see why the previous face of The  Doctor had to regenerate. But it's not a terrible story, and it's fun to watch the new guy run around trying to figure things out.


Serial 6: Dragonfire
(7, Mel, Ace, Glitz)
75 minutes

It's time for a changing of The Companions. Mel, we hardly knew ye, so Get Out. It's really strange to try and describe the episodes of this era. Shit goes down between characters and aliens you've never seen before, and never will again. Some of it is interesting.


Serial 7: The Greatest Show In The Galaxy
(7, Ace, Psychic Circus)
100 minutes

Ok, this is fairly easy to explain, The Doctor and the companion we met in the last episode go to a Psychic Circus. Evil clowns. No escape. Robots. This is the kind of weird sci-fi adventure you can explain to your friends and not have them immediately ask "Why do you watch that shit?"


Serial 8: Curse Of The Fenric
(7th, Ace, Haemovores)
100 minutes

This is another weird timey-wimey episode. We find out just how Ace, The Doctor's companion for the last two serials, came to meet up with The Doctor in the first place, and we get some super dark family shit to go with it.  It also has one of those timey-wimey things where a creature time travels to help create itself, and by not creating itself it's existence is...just watch the episode.


Serial 9: Survival
(7, Ace, The Master, Cheetah People)
​75 minutes

Wouldn't it be really weird for a children's science fiction show to end with the spunky point-of-view companion character essentially turning into a cheetah person and then she and her time travelling friend step into their time machine and are never seen again? Because that's sort of what happened if you were watching the series as it came out. We're not going to leave you in such despair, but this episode is at least interesting, as it also features that rubbish bearded Time Shithead, The Master. He's definitely a villain here, but more Of Circumstance than he usually is. It's kind of fine that this killed the "classic" era of Who, as it was getting fairly disappointing.


Serial 10: The Enemy Within
(8, 7, Grace, The Master)
90 minutes

Usually, a regeneration episode involves The Doctor doing something heroic, and at the very end of the episode turning into a new person, saying one cool line, and then ending. In this episode we get to spend a decent amount of time with Sylvester McCoy. It's unclear how long it's been since Survival, but he is on his own, bringing the ashes of The Master to dump out in space or something. But ohhhhhh, even as ashes, The Master fucks shit up, and his chaos leads to The Doctor having to regenerate in America. This wraps up what is easily The Weakest Season of Doctor Who. 

A few years ago, I was asked to come up with a Doctor Who In 50 Episodes List on Facebook. For people who wanted to get really into the series without getting Super Really Into The Series.  With over fifty years worth of episodes, the prospect of becoming a fan of Doctor Who can be completely daunting.

I've compiled this list of episodes that I like, so it's very subjective. I have tried to make it so that there is a rough arc to the seasons. I don't give a fuck about episodes that are historically important, this is a guide intended to make you Like The Series, not be an Expert On The Series.

Here are the basics you should know: The show is about an alien time traveler. He takes companions, almost always humans, with him as he explores time and space. The companions change frequently, and in this guide, you sometimes get no closure. You might love a particular companion in one episode, and, in the next, they've been replaced by people you have no context for. Also, when The Doctor gets very ill, his appearance changes. By which, I mean, he is portrayed by an entirely different actor.  This is a cool concept, but it can be jarring at first. It will happen Thirteen Times over the course of these eleven seasons.

We spent all last season with Tom Baker, his scarf, his silly robotic dog, and a series of mostly female companions. This season will run in the opposite direction as we have multiple doctors, returning companions, and a Doctor who finds the bright scarf so tacky, that he garlands his new outfit with a fucken vegetable.

Serial 1: Logopolis
100 minutes

The Doctor and Adric, the child companion he picked up last season, end up with two more accidental companions as they tangle with The Master who has a new face, sort of. He actually looks Much Like the previous version but is slightly younger. Same rubbish beard, though. This time, the upper hand is his, and The Doctor totally dies! Well, as much as The Doctor can die, I guess.


Serial 2: Castltrova
100 minutes

The Master can't win. So the new, younger-faced Doctor and the ragtag group of companions he inherited are going to track that fucker down and stomp him 'til he's dead, too!  That's how this show works, right? No, I guess not. This episode is mostly the two new companions dragging the disoriented Doctor around a strange planet while The Master kidnaps Adric to...See This Is Why You Don't Take Kids On The TARDIS. Ugh. 


Serial 3: Kinda
100 minutes

Sssssssssssssnakes innnnnnnnnn sssssssspaaaaaaaaaacccccccccccce? How will the three new companions and their celery-wearing Doctor fare now that The Doctor sort of has his shit together? Well, one of them will be stored away on the TARDIS for most of the adventure, while the flight attendant and the child battle a hypnotic cult and bickering scientists. And a snake. Don't forget the gigantic snake.



Serial 4: Earthshock
100 minutes

Sometimes, you want something to happen, and then it happens, and you feel kinda bad about it. All I'll say is that The Cybermen are back in this episode, and they are Not Fucking Around.


Serial 5: Mawdryn Undead
100 minutes

That last episode was kind of dark. Let's do something more fun. Let's find a new villain to try and kill The Doctor, oooh and a desperate young man, and...Hey Look, it's a previous companion! ish. The Doctor and his crew travel back and forth between 1977 and 1983, and between Earth and Somewhere Else, as they encounter a villain trying to unlock Time Lord technology! Fun! 


Serial 6: The Five Doctors
90 minutes

Oh Shit. It's All The Doctors. And it's Many Many Companions. And it's The Master. And it's Time Lords. And it's Daleks. And it's Cybermen. And it's Rassilon. And it's chaos, as four of the doctors must work together to stop themselves from being erased from time, while one of their incarnations is trapped in a...well, he didn't want to do this special, so he's just archival footage. Do YOU want to be trapped in archival footage? I didn't think so.


Serial 7: Planet Of Fire
100 minutes

Look, some shit's gone down since The Five Doctor ordeal, a companion Had Enough and walked out, Daleks came and went, a whole mess of things you could look into if you wanted. But here you get to meet a new, Terrible Fucken Companion with an American accent on par with every high school student's Terrible British Accent. There's also a new weird robotty companion who wasn't often used, because It's Fucken Awful. But here, The Master uses him for his nefarious purposes, and at the end of the episode, the only decent companion stays behind. Great.


Serial 8: Caves Of Androzani
100 minutes

This final Peter Davison episode shows up on virtually every Best Episode of Doctor Who list I've ever seen. It's got social commentary, heroics, and some surprise cameos, including the introduction of the new Doctor who is going to take the series in a darker direction.


Serial 9: A Girl's Best Friend​
50 minutes

But that darker direction is going to have to wait! Forget The Doctor, let's check in on good old companion, Sarah Jane Smith, as she goes to take a vacation from her investigative journalism, only to end up reunited with That Stupid Fucken Dog companion, and have to solve a mystery involving some witchy neighbors. This was supposed to serve as the pilot for a Sarah Jane series, but sadly, that particular series never surfaced.


Serial 10: The Mark Of The Rani
90 minutes

It's not Coli Baker's fault that a lot of his episodes aren't very good. They gave him a ridiculous costume, the writing was fairly mediocre, and he inherited the companion with the awful fake accent. But here he runs afoul of that goddamned evil Time Lord, The Ma---wait, nope. It's a NEW evil Time Lor-- Time La-- Time Person, The Rani. Oh, wait, The Master is there, too.  Stupid Time Lord bastards.

Serial 1: The Brain Of Morbius
100 minutes

We begin this season with a Frankenstein's monster stories, and a lovely group of ladies called The Sisterhood Of Karn.  This first serial has it all, alien bugs, a hook-handed assistant, wrecked spacecraft, an elixir of immortality. This season is going to be bonkers fun.


Serial 2: The Hand Of Fear
100 minutes

It's not even in these short seasons that we get to say goodbye to a companion. So let's wave sayonara to Sarah Jane, as she departs of her own free will to return to the glamorous life of investigative journalism. But first, they are menaced by a HAND!!!! Is it the absent hand from the hook-limbed assistant in the previous episode? Was this season written by George Lucas? It's  mystery.


Serial 3: The Deadly Assassin
100 minutes

Oh great, it's those fucken TIme Lord assholes again. Morbius was grumbling about them in the first episode. What Do They Want? OH NO. Someone just killed one of those high-collared assholes, maybe The Doctor's new companion will---wait a minute, THERE IS NO COMPANION!!!! Who will help The Doctor get out of this mess? It looks like he's all on his o---is that The goddamned Master, again? Fuck.


Serial 4: The Ribos Operation
100 minutes

This is, technically, the first episode of the sixteenth season of Doctor Who (see how much I've cut for you, Be Grateful!). The entire season was an extended take on The Keys Of Marius, and it was pretty good. We're not going to include all of it, because it would take up a lot of space, but if you like the first episode, you can always adventure out on your own and follow the story. In the nowwhile, we have a new companion, and she's a Time Lor--Lady--Lord? Gender is also wibbly-wobbly-timey-wimey.


Serial 5: Destiny Of The Daleks
100 minutes

This is, technically, the first episode of the seventeenth season. Holy shit, right? And that companion we met last time? The Time L---something? She's regenerating! Meet her again for the first time! And...Daleks? It seems there is another race that is setting out to do what The Doctor hasn't been able to do...wipe out The Daleks. Will The Doctor and Davros end up in a buddy comedy trying to save the adorable little Garbage Cans Of Death? No. No they won't.


Serial 6: City Of Death
100 minutes

Interstellar art thieves have targeted The Mona Lisa. And they're not just interstellar, they're Time Travelers! At least they're not Time Lords, though, right? This episode was cowritten by Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy guy, the Dirk Gently guy, the funny fucker who wrote great sci-fi. So this is a more fun than usual episode. Enjoy it!


Serial 7: The Leisure Hive
100 minutes

This is the first episode where a companion Bites The Big Mortal Thing. But not, like, forever. No, it's not the Time Lo--La--Lo...it's not even a humanoid, and it's a companion you've mostly been protected from, so it's not going to be as therapeutic for you as it was for fans at the time, but the episode starts with a BOOM!  And then, the vacationing Doctor and Romana (The Time L---Person) stumble into a Recreation Generator, which has a Very Unfortunate Side Effect for The Doctor.


Serial 8: Full Circle
100 minutes

It's time for Romana to go back to Gallifrey. Surely this means more hijinks with those High Collared Asshole Time Lords. Wait, this is The Wrong Planet, morons. This planet has way too many children on it. Kids are So Annoying. I'm so glad that all of The Doctor's companions have been grown ups since Screechy Susan and Vicki disappeared in season one.  Maybe the Doctor will actually get a male companion who is age appropriate to his----DOCTOR, ONE OF THOSE LITTLE SHITS HAS STOWED AWAY ON YOUR TARDIS. GET HIM OUT!!! GET HIM---Damn it.


Serial 9: State Of Decay
100 minutes

Stupid child companion. Stupid robotic dog companion that somehow got rebuilt since the explosion. Stupid Romana, still being stupid on the stupid TARDIS.  (Narrator leaves to kick rocks) This episode centers on a planet with medieval culture that seems out of place, and a group of bat gu---IS THIS A VAMPIRE EPISODE? (Narrator gnashes teeth. Kicks boulders.)


Serial 10: Warrior's Gate
100 minutes

I have to come clean. I've been hiding something from you. Remember how I told you I didn't include the season long story arc in season 16 because it was TOO LONG. Well, these last serials are actually a trilogy called The E-Space Trilogy.  It's a void between worlds kind of thing, spacey-wacey, sciency-wiency. And it serves to get Romana and the stupid dog Off The Goddamed TARDIS. But this kid appears to be sticking around. And...holy shit, we made it through an entire season without The Doctor regenerating. Pretttttty coooooool.

Episode 1: War Games Part 10
25 minutes

Much like last season, we start with a single short episode, as opposed to a serial. War Games was a ten episode epic about a battle for supremacy on alien planet where they have abducted Earthlings to, essentially, act as war reenactors from various periods of Earth history. It takes ForEVer. But in the tenth episode, we meet The Doctor's race, The Time Lords. And what a bunch of pretentious assholes they turn out to be. No wonder The Doctor doesn't hang out with them. After he calls on them for help, they not only send his companions back to where they came from, they force him to regenerate, and exile him to Earth. What a fester of shitbags.


Serial 2: Spearhead From Space
100 minutes

Imagine waking up with a new face, on a planet you know but aren't from, and all you want to do is fucken sleep it off, and some military jackwits who knew your old face drag you to their hospital. By the time you feel better there's some sort of invasion thing happening involving fucken mannequins. Hold on, this is ALSO the plot of the damned reboot from 2005 but with extra bonus military.  The Autons are such a ridiculous enemy, we surely won't ever see them again.


Serial 3: Terror Of The Autons
100 minutes

For fuck's sake. Autons again? And who the hell is The Master? Another damned Time Lord? An evil Time Lord? I mean, they all sort of suck, so what makes this guy eviler than the rest of them? Oh shit, is this guy also trapped on Earth now? Is this the point where the soundtrack would go Dun-dun-DUNNNNNNN?


Serial 4: Colony In Space
150 minutes

So The Doctor is the most competent Time Lords, and he has been banished to Earth, where he managed to trap another Time Lord. Ok. But now bad shit is going down somewhere and The Time Lords have no choice but to call up Earth and be like "Ohhhhh, hey Doctor, how is Earth? Yea? Wow, that totally sucks. Look, you're Still Grounded but mommy and daddy need you to go and fix this mining disaster that we just can't wrap our heads around. Ok? When you're done, you're going to have to go back to your room, but for now, enjoy the night of freedom. And....try not to die. LOVE YOU." And, of course, The fucken Master is going to show up in this shitshow, too. Time Lords are THE WORST.



Serial 5: The Time Monster
150 minutes

You know, you say he's exiled on Earth you Time Lord Assholes, but you do keep needing him to run errands for you, and Every Fucken Time, The goddamned Master shows up to try and foil him. How may times does The Master just hypnotise his way into shenanigans, only to have The Doctor foil them at the last minute, but allow him to escape. Well, this time it'll be totally differ---no, same thing again, huh? Ok.


Serial 6: The Three Doctors
100 minutes

Another damned Time Lord errand? Only this time, instead of The Master, it's some other Criminal Time Lord named Omega? This sounds like every other episode but with a slightly different villain. Only this one's in a mask instead of a goatee. What makes him so special? Oh Shit. You need not only the current Doctor, but the two previous versions of The Doctor to take him down. How the fuck is crotchety old due going to be helpful in this scenario? You know what, I'll just sit back and see how this works itself out.



Serial 7: Planet Of The Spiders
150 minutes

We haven't been paying a lot of attention to the companions in this season. There's The Brigadier, some military people, and there have been a couple of scientists helping out (attractive female scientists of course, this was the 1970s). Well now there's a journalist named Sarah Jane who will be around Quite A Bit More Frequently than most companions. Well, the pesky journalist, one of the pesky military types, and a rock sent by one of those pretty scientists lead The Doctor to a spider problem. A very complex spider problem, and Oh Shit, it's time to regenerate again.



Serial 8: Ark In Space
100 minutes

Yo. This show must involve actual time travelers because this new Doctor with his Huge-Ass Scarf is clearly starring in the movie Alien here. Only this came out Before Alien. Mind. Fucked. Only instead of those nightmare-inducing Xenomorphs it's...green bubble wrap? But it does eventually turn you into a giant insect. Fun!


Serial 9: Genesis Of The Daleks
150 minutes

The genocidal trash cans are back! Sort of. Wibbly-wobbly timey-wimeyness means we're back at the time The Daleks came into being. Man, their creator is cuh-ray-zee. But since we're back a the origin point for the race, surely The Doctor will just kill their creator before they come into being and we'll never have to see them again. That's obviously what's going to happen. Right?


Serial 10: Terror Of The Zygons
100 minutes

It's the Loch Ness fucken monster! And weird rubber chameleon aliens. They are Not Fucking Around. Let's wrap this season up with some good old fashion monster fighting and mistaken identity. And let's put aside UNIT (the military outfit that showed up seven times this season!) away for awhile. 

A few years ago, I was asked to come up with a Doctor Who In 50 Episodes List on Facebook. For people who wanted to get really into the series without getting Super Really Into The Series.  With over fifty years worth of episodes, the prospect of becoming a fan of Doctor Who can be completely daunting.

Garden variety Who Guides advise you to start at the beginning of the 2005 reboot, or at the beginning of Stephen Moffat's tenure as The Doctor, and progress forward until you catch up. One slightly more creative method suggests you start with The Eleventh Hour (the first Eleventh Doctor episode, also the beginning of Moffat's run on the show) watch up to the final episode before the 50th Anniversary special, and then Go Back to the beginning of the reboot until you get back to Eleventh Hour, and then skip back to the 50th Anniversary special. I like the creativity, but there are a Ton of Bad to Awful episodes of Doctor Who in every season, and if you're not a super fan, why subject yourself to them.

There is also The Complete Masochists Order of Doctor Who, which says start with the first episode from 1963, and keep going until you eventually catch up.

That's infuckentimidating.

I suggest starting in 1963, and skipping entire swaths of the show. Even doing this, I recognize, is hugely daunting. But if you choose to watch it like it was a current Netflix show, ten episodes a season, which you can watch back to back, one a night, every time your ex calls, however you choose, and then take a break before diving into the next season.

I've compiled this list of episodes that I like, so it's very subjective. I have tried to make it so that there is a rough arc to the seasons. I don't give a fuck about episodes that are historically important. The first episode featuring The Daleks is thirty-seven excruciating years long, and wouldn't inspire a modern audience to want more of them. This is a guide intended to make you Like The Series, not be an Expert On The Series.

Here are the basics you should know: The show is about an alien time traveler. He takes companions, almost always humans, with him as he explores time and space. The companions change frequently, and in this guide, you sometimes get no closure. You might love a particular companion in one episode, and, in the next, they've been replaced by people you have no context for. Also, when The Doctor gets very ill, his appearance changes. By which, I mean, he is portrayed by an entirely different actor.  This is a cool concept, but it can be jarring at first. It will happen Thirteen Times over the course of these eleven seasons. Strap in.

Episode 1: An Unearthly Child
25 minutes

Teenagers are weird, huh? With their rock and roll, and their doing homework. Two nosey teachers decide to follow one of their students, only to discover her crotchety grandfather is some sort of time traveling alien, and he Doesn't Like Them. It's a damn good thing they didn't follow her into his unreliable time machine. Oops.


Serial 2: The Keys Of Marinus
150 minutes

The old man has chilled out a bit, and has brought the companions to a beach party planet! Oh. It turns out the water is poison, the beach is made of glass, and several people appear to be trying to kill them. Bummer. They also keep getting separated. Luckily, Susan fucken screams every two minutes like a parrot getting its tail stepped on, so they never lose her for long. Each episode of this serial involves finding a piece to a puzzle that will help save the planet. OR WILL IT?


Serial 3: The Aztecs
100 minutes

We're back on Earth! Finally, Barbara and Ian are back home. Wait a minute. This is waaaaay early on the timeline. And Barbara is a fuken goddess. Take that, crotchety Doctor. Watch as she changes an entire culture to keep a couple of her dumbass companions from accidentally getting married. What's that? She can't change the culture? Time can't be altered? Oh. Well, that doesn't bode well.


Serial 4: The Dalek Invasion Of Earth 
150 minutes

Now we've gone too far forward in time. Stupid Doctor and his Stupid Wonky-Ass Phone Booth Looking Time Machine.  Still, at least we're still on Earth, and it's filled with humans and...are those garbage cans with lasers attached? What the fuck is a Dalek? Why are they killing Everything? Is it even possible to save Earth? And, if so, will it come at A Great Cost? And will Ian and Barbara ever get home?



Serial 5: The Space Museum
100 minutes

The Getting Less Crotchety All The Time Doctor takes his companions on a fun excursion through a museum filled with alien artifacts. Even though all Ian and Barbara want to do is go home, and Vicki...who the fuck is Vicki? Are you telling me we finally got rid of the whiney teenager, and we've replaced her with another whiney teenager? Cripes and for fuck's sake. Well, at least the population of the planet isn't trying to rebel against the museum staff and destroy it, right? Shit. And wait just a damned minute, are they being tracked by Daleks?


Serial 6: The Chase
150 minutes

Poor Ian and Barbara have been trying to get home this entire time, but Stupid Doctor and his Stupid Time Machine can't get it right. And now there are more fucken Daleks following them through time. This adventure gets completely wacky as The Doctor, his companions, and The Daleks gor from planet to planet enacting a wide array of hijinks, but maybe, just maybe, by the end of it, Ian and Barbara will finally get back home. Wait, who the fuck is Steven?



Serial 7: The Gunfighters 
100 minutes

It's a wild west American holiday, complete with a terrible approximation of an American ballad, American guns, Americanish accents, and...Dodo? Really? There's a new companion and her name is Dodo? What the fuck? Well, tarnation, iffen they didn't plum find themselves in the middle of a darned feuuuuuuuuuud. Luckily, everything will end up settled at the OK Corrall. Ohhhhhhhhh. THAT feud. Well, horsefeathers, this is fittin to be complicated.


Serial 8: The Tenth Planet 
100 minutes

I know I said I was going to avoid mediocre episodes that are historically important, but this one is kind of necessary. Meet The Cybermen. They're like a more humanoid looking version of The Daleks. I mean, they're like The Borg in Star Trek. I mean, look, they're tropey now, but The Cybermen predate The Borg by many years. And, also like The Daleks, they pop up frequently in The Doctor's travels. And by the end of this serial, Polly and Ben (wait, who the fuck are Polly and Ben? Where did Dodo and Steve go---you know what good riddance to those two anyway) have to contend with a very ill Doctor as he regenerates into an entirely new face.


Serial 9: Tomb Of The Cybermen
100 minutes

See? More fucken Cybermen already. But this slightly more youthful looking Doctor guides Jamie and Victoria (wait just a damned minute, what happened to Polly and B---nevermind) through a Cyber graveyard, only to discover, surprise surprise assholes, The Cybermen aren't dead! This new doctor is certainly more inspirational than the last one, I hope he sticks around for a while.


Serial 10: The Enemy Of The World
150 minutes

Well, if you happen to like the new actor playing The Doctor, it's your Luckiest of days. The Doctor, Jamie, and Victoria (whew, I know all of those people!) are hanging out in the far flung future of 2018 (woah, we are about to be living in their Far Flung Future!) where a megalomaniac has seized power (as if such a thing could possibly happen in 2018....*narrator sobs uncontrollably*). But the megalomaniac happens to look Exactly Like The Doctor. So he's the perfect alien to rescue society from him. Although....what if he were to get his hands on the TARDIS? The companions might not even notice? Why that would change every-fucken-thing. And this is how The First Season ends? That's troubling.