Serial 1: Night Of The Doctor/Rose
(9, 8, Rose, Mickey, Jackie, Autons, Sisterhood Of Karn, Daleks)
55 minutes

The foppy Doctor we saw at the end of the last season has aged into a kindly hard-ass. Apparently, there's some war taking place between The Time Assholes and The Daleks, and people are afraid of both of them. After a ship crashes, The Sisterhood Of Karn from Season Three offer The Doctor a chance to become a warrior as he is forced to regenerate into a different face. Flash forward an indeterminate amount of time, and he has regenerated again into a goofy leather jacket wearing guy who ends up on Earth in the 21st century, where the fucken Autons, who we haven't seen since Season Two, are basically retrying their plans from Spearhead In Space, but The Doctor ends up meeting a girl named Rose and her boyfriend as they team up to defend Earth.


Serial 2: Aliens Of London/World War Three
(9, Rose, Mickey, Jackie, Harriet, Slitheen)
90 minutes

Farting aliens trying to take over Earth does not sound like a wonderful premise, but The Doctor and Rose manage to pull it off.  And we meet a plucky member of parliament named Harriet Jones.


Episode 3: Dalek
(9, Rose, Adam, Daleks)
45 minutes

We've seen The Doctor battle multiple armies of Daleks. He was there at the beginning of The Daleks. He has survived So Many Daleks. They were even in that war that keeps getting mentioned. So how bad could just one Dalek be?


Episode 4: The Long Game
(9, Rose, Adam)

TV bad. So bad. TV make Earth humans lazy, dumb, whatever stereotype you've heard. There are several Davies-era episode where this is the theme, while Moffat modernizes it to Internet bad. So bad. This TV bad episode gives us a better look into The Doctor , though, and plants the seed for an even better better look into The Dotor in a future episode.


Serial 5: The Empty Child/The Doctor Dances
(9, Rose, Jack)
90 minutes

It's World War Two and The Doctor and Rose meet a new companion (Jack), a scary little boy, and unpack a weird intergalactic mystery that accidentally threatens the whole world. This episode is fantastic, and has one of the best climactic Doctor quotes of the whole series.


Serial 6: Bad Wolf/Parting Of The Ways
(9, 10, Rose, Jack, Mickey, Jackie, Daleks)
90 minutes

The phrase "Bad Wolf" has been following The Doctor and Rose since they met. When they, along with Jack, travel to the future, they stumble upon what they think it might mean. Oh, and Daleks. They stumble on Daleks. Lots and lots of fucken Daleks. In order to save the present, The Doctor and his companions must totally fuck each other up, and, in the end The Doctor has to regenerate to survive. Oh, and TV? Still bad.


Episode 7: The Christmas Invasion
(10, Rose, Mickey, Jackie, Harriet, Sycorax)
60 minutes

The new Doctor's regeneration didn't go well, so while he recuperates, Rose, her mother, her boyfriend, and Harriet Jones must work together to fight off an alien invasion at Christmas. This episode features one of the most Badass Doctor moments near the end of it. Though whether it was necessary or cruel is very debatable.


Episode 8: School Reunion
(10, Rose, Mickey, Sara Jane, K-9, Krilltanes)
45 minutes

Oh shit! It's Sarah Jane! And that stupid fucken dog. They're back for hijinks with The Doctor's new crew of Rose and her boyfriend. They battle...Giles from Buffy The Vampire Slayer. And...is he kind of a vampire here? Weeeeeeeeeeird.


Serial 9: Rise Of The Cybermen/Age Of Steel
(10, Rose, Mickey, Jackie, Pete, Cybermen)
90 minutes

Rose has daddy issues. Maybe that's why she ran off into space with a centuries old man. But when the crew accidentally travels to an alternate dimension, she finds her father is alive. Oh, and there are fucken Cybermen EVERYWHERE. While it would be nice, and all, to save this dimension from The Cybermen, the real issue is Can They Ever Get Back To The Dimension They Came From? Well....not all of them.


Serial 10: Army Of Ghosts/Doomsday
(10, Rose, Mickey, Donna, Jackie, Pete, Cybermen, Daleks)
90 minutes

Cybermen AND Daleks? Holy shit. That whole Other Dimension adventure totally fucked with the walls of time...or something...and The Cybermen have broken through and inadvertently released a ship of Daleks from The Time War. Ohhhhhh shit. And get your hankies ready because Bad Wolf is back, and it means sad times for The Doctor. 

A few years ago, I was asked to come up with a Doctor Who In 50 Episodes List on Facebook. For people who wanted to get really into the series without getting Super Really Into The Series.  With over fifty years worth of episodes, the prospect of becoming a fan of Doctor Who can be completely daunting.

I've compiled this list of episodes that I like, so it's very subjective. I have tried to make it so that there is a rough arc to the seasons. I don't give a fuck about episodes that are historically important, this is a guide intended to make you Like The Series, not be an Expert On The Series.

Here are the basics you should know: The show is about an alien time traveler. He takes companions, almost always humans, with him as he explores time and space. The companions change frequently, and in this guide, you sometimes get no closure. You might love a particular companion in one episode, and, in the next, they've been replaced by people you have no context for. Also, when The Doctor gets very ill, his appearance changes. By which, I mean, he is portrayed by an entirely different actor.  This is a cool concept, but it can be jarring at first. It will happen Thirteen Times over the course of these eleven seasons.

Last season ended with the promise of A Darker Direction. And it's hard to take that too seriously when the new Doctor's costume is so clowny. But this era is a shade darker than Baker's jellybabies and Davison's celery.  This season is filled with Mean Old Asshole Time Lords. And Time Ladies. People, damn it, Time People. I wish some sort of war would wipe them out of space once and for all.

 Serial 1: The Two Doctors
(6, 2, Peri, Jamie, Sontarans)
135 minutes

Usually, a multiple Doctor episode features the most recent faces of The Doctor teaming up to battle something Time Lord related. But this time we go way back to the second face of The Doctor as he and Jamie (remember him?) end up being trapped by Sontarans who are trying to master time travel. It's up to the current face of The Doctor and his shittily-accented companion to rescue them and restore the timeline. Or whatever. It's a grim way to start A Grim Season.



Serial 2: Revelation Of The Daleks
(6, Peri, Davros, Daleks)
90 minutes

It's been a while since the genocidal grey trash cans have bugged The Doctor. So The Supreme Dalek and his army set out to kill The Doctor....yawn. But, oh shit, it's Davros, and his New Even More Perfect (TM) Daleks. They're so dreamy and creamy. Surely a war between two Dalek armies will result in fewer Daleks by the end of it. How could this be a bad thing?


Serial 3: Terror Of The Vervoids (Trial Of A Time Lord)
(6, Mel, Time Lords, Vervoids, Valeyard)
100 minutes

This is part of a season long arc where The Doctor is put on trial by those asshole Time Lords for being un-Time Lord like or some shit. So the framing device is The Doctor in court recounting his un-Time Lord like adventures. It's not a great season. It's not even a good season. But Terror Of The Vervoids introduces a new companion, and focuses more on the adventure with the aliens than on the trial aspect.
​

Serial 4: The Ultimate Foe (Trial Of A Time Lord)
(6, Mel, Glitz, Time Lords, The Master, Valeyard)
55 minutes

It's  the end of the arc that we mostly skipped! Who is The Valeyard? Do we care? Is The Doctor guilty of anything besides not being as much of an asshole as those other asshole Time Lords? Oh, also The Master is in this for some reason? And the trial is in a future that won't ha--look, it's an okay episode, and I didn't want to cut out all of Colin Baker's run, since it's totally not his fault that his era was so blah.


Serial 5: Time And The Rani
(7, Mel, Rani, Tetraps)
100 minutes

New Doctor! Return of one of them there evil Time Lo-- Time La-- Time People! This is the second episode in a row where I'll admit, it's Not A Great episode. But there wasn't much to choose from. Low budgets, mediocre writers, no real direction to the seasons, except the heavy handed Trial Of A Timelord. We don't even get to see why the previous face of The  Doctor had to regenerate. But it's not a terrible story, and it's fun to watch the new guy run around trying to figure things out.


Serial 6: Dragonfire
(7, Mel, Ace, Glitz)
75 minutes

It's time for a changing of The Companions. Mel, we hardly knew ye, so Get Out. It's really strange to try and describe the episodes of this era. Shit goes down between characters and aliens you've never seen before, and never will again. Some of it is interesting.


Serial 7: The Greatest Show In The Galaxy
(7, Ace, Psychic Circus)
100 minutes

Ok, this is fairly easy to explain, The Doctor and the companion we met in the last episode go to a Psychic Circus. Evil clowns. No escape. Robots. This is the kind of weird sci-fi adventure you can explain to your friends and not have them immediately ask "Why do you watch that shit?"


Serial 8: Curse Of The Fenric
(7th, Ace, Haemovores)
100 minutes

This is another weird timey-wimey episode. We find out just how Ace, The Doctor's companion for the last two serials, came to meet up with The Doctor in the first place, and we get some super dark family shit to go with it.  It also has one of those timey-wimey things where a creature time travels to help create itself, and by not creating itself it's existence is...just watch the episode.


Serial 9: Survival
(7, Ace, The Master, Cheetah People)
​75 minutes

Wouldn't it be really weird for a children's science fiction show to end with the spunky point-of-view companion character essentially turning into a cheetah person and then she and her time travelling friend step into their time machine and are never seen again? Because that's sort of what happened if you were watching the series as it came out. We're not going to leave you in such despair, but this episode is at least interesting, as it also features that rubbish bearded Time Shithead, The Master. He's definitely a villain here, but more Of Circumstance than he usually is. It's kind of fine that this killed the "classic" era of Who, as it was getting fairly disappointing.


Serial 10: The Enemy Within
(8, 7, Grace, The Master)
90 minutes

Usually, a regeneration episode involves The Doctor doing something heroic, and at the very end of the episode turning into a new person, saying one cool line, and then ending. In this episode we get to spend a decent amount of time with Sylvester McCoy. It's unclear how long it's been since Survival, but he is on his own, bringing the ashes of The Master to dump out in space or something. But ohhhhhh, even as ashes, The Master fucks shit up, and his chaos leads to The Doctor having to regenerate in America. This wraps up what is easily The Weakest Season of Doctor Who. 

A few years ago, I was asked to come up with a Doctor Who In 50 Episodes List on Facebook. For people who wanted to get really into the series without getting Super Really Into The Series.  With over fifty years worth of episodes, the prospect of becoming a fan of Doctor Who can be completely daunting.

I've compiled this list of episodes that I like, so it's very subjective. I have tried to make it so that there is a rough arc to the seasons. I don't give a fuck about episodes that are historically important, this is a guide intended to make you Like The Series, not be an Expert On The Series.

Here are the basics you should know: The show is about an alien time traveler. He takes companions, almost always humans, with him as he explores time and space. The companions change frequently, and in this guide, you sometimes get no closure. You might love a particular companion in one episode, and, in the next, they've been replaced by people you have no context for. Also, when The Doctor gets very ill, his appearance changes. By which, I mean, he is portrayed by an entirely different actor.  This is a cool concept, but it can be jarring at first. It will happen Thirteen Times over the course of these eleven seasons.

We spent all last season with Tom Baker, his scarf, his silly robotic dog, and a series of mostly female companions. This season will run in the opposite direction as we have multiple doctors, returning companions, and a Doctor who finds the bright scarf so tacky, that he garlands his new outfit with a fucken vegetable.

Serial 1: Logopolis
100 minutes

The Doctor and Adric, the child companion he picked up last season, end up with two more accidental companions as they tangle with The Master who has a new face, sort of. He actually looks Much Like the previous version but is slightly younger. Same rubbish beard, though. This time, the upper hand is his, and The Doctor totally dies! Well, as much as The Doctor can die, I guess.


Serial 2: Castltrova
100 minutes

The Master can't win. So the new, younger-faced Doctor and the ragtag group of companions he inherited are going to track that fucker down and stomp him 'til he's dead, too!  That's how this show works, right? No, I guess not. This episode is mostly the two new companions dragging the disoriented Doctor around a strange planet while The Master kidnaps Adric to...See This Is Why You Don't Take Kids On The TARDIS. Ugh. 


Serial 3: Kinda
100 minutes

Sssssssssssssnakes innnnnnnnnn sssssssspaaaaaaaaaacccccccccccce? How will the three new companions and their celery-wearing Doctor fare now that The Doctor sort of has his shit together? Well, one of them will be stored away on the TARDIS for most of the adventure, while the flight attendant and the child battle a hypnotic cult and bickering scientists. And a snake. Don't forget the gigantic snake.



Serial 4: Earthshock
100 minutes

Sometimes, you want something to happen, and then it happens, and you feel kinda bad about it. All I'll say is that The Cybermen are back in this episode, and they are Not Fucking Around.


Serial 5: Mawdryn Undead
100 minutes

That last episode was kind of dark. Let's do something more fun. Let's find a new villain to try and kill The Doctor, oooh and a desperate young man, and...Hey Look, it's a previous companion! ish. The Doctor and his crew travel back and forth between 1977 and 1983, and between Earth and Somewhere Else, as they encounter a villain trying to unlock Time Lord technology! Fun! 


Serial 6: The Five Doctors
90 minutes

Oh Shit. It's All The Doctors. And it's Many Many Companions. And it's The Master. And it's Time Lords. And it's Daleks. And it's Cybermen. And it's Rassilon. And it's chaos, as four of the doctors must work together to stop themselves from being erased from time, while one of their incarnations is trapped in a...well, he didn't want to do this special, so he's just archival footage. Do YOU want to be trapped in archival footage? I didn't think so.


Serial 7: Planet Of Fire
100 minutes

Look, some shit's gone down since The Five Doctor ordeal, a companion Had Enough and walked out, Daleks came and went, a whole mess of things you could look into if you wanted. But here you get to meet a new, Terrible Fucken Companion with an American accent on par with every high school student's Terrible British Accent. There's also a new weird robotty companion who wasn't often used, because It's Fucken Awful. But here, The Master uses him for his nefarious purposes, and at the end of the episode, the only decent companion stays behind. Great.


Serial 8: Caves Of Androzani
100 minutes

This final Peter Davison episode shows up on virtually every Best Episode of Doctor Who list I've ever seen. It's got social commentary, heroics, and some surprise cameos, including the introduction of the new Doctor who is going to take the series in a darker direction.


Serial 9: A Girl's Best Friend​
50 minutes

But that darker direction is going to have to wait! Forget The Doctor, let's check in on good old companion, Sarah Jane Smith, as she goes to take a vacation from her investigative journalism, only to end up reunited with That Stupid Fucken Dog companion, and have to solve a mystery involving some witchy neighbors. This was supposed to serve as the pilot for a Sarah Jane series, but sadly, that particular series never surfaced.


Serial 10: The Mark Of The Rani
90 minutes

It's not Coli Baker's fault that a lot of his episodes aren't very good. They gave him a ridiculous costume, the writing was fairly mediocre, and he inherited the companion with the awful fake accent. But here he runs afoul of that goddamned evil Time Lord, The Ma---wait, nope. It's a NEW evil Time Lor-- Time La-- Time Person, The Rani. Oh, wait, The Master is there, too.  Stupid Time Lord bastards.

Serial 1: The Brain Of Morbius
100 minutes

We begin this season with a Frankenstein's monster stories, and a lovely group of ladies called The Sisterhood Of Karn.  This first serial has it all, alien bugs, a hook-handed assistant, wrecked spacecraft, an elixir of immortality. This season is going to be bonkers fun.


Serial 2: The Hand Of Fear
100 minutes

It's not even in these short seasons that we get to say goodbye to a companion. So let's wave sayonara to Sarah Jane, as she departs of her own free will to return to the glamorous life of investigative journalism. But first, they are menaced by a HAND!!!! Is it the absent hand from the hook-limbed assistant in the previous episode? Was this season written by George Lucas? It's  mystery.


Serial 3: The Deadly Assassin
100 minutes

Oh great, it's those fucken TIme Lord assholes again. Morbius was grumbling about them in the first episode. What Do They Want? OH NO. Someone just killed one of those high-collared assholes, maybe The Doctor's new companion will---wait a minute, THERE IS NO COMPANION!!!! Who will help The Doctor get out of this mess? It looks like he's all on his o---is that The goddamned Master, again? Fuck.


Serial 4: The Ribos Operation
100 minutes

This is, technically, the first episode of the sixteenth season of Doctor Who (see how much I've cut for you, Be Grateful!). The entire season was an extended take on The Keys Of Marius, and it was pretty good. We're not going to include all of it, because it would take up a lot of space, but if you like the first episode, you can always adventure out on your own and follow the story. In the nowwhile, we have a new companion, and she's a Time Lor--Lady--Lord? Gender is also wibbly-wobbly-timey-wimey.


Serial 5: Destiny Of The Daleks
100 minutes

This is, technically, the first episode of the seventeenth season. Holy shit, right? And that companion we met last time? The Time L---something? She's regenerating! Meet her again for the first time! And...Daleks? It seems there is another race that is setting out to do what The Doctor hasn't been able to do...wipe out The Daleks. Will The Doctor and Davros end up in a buddy comedy trying to save the adorable little Garbage Cans Of Death? No. No they won't.


Serial 6: City Of Death
100 minutes

Interstellar art thieves have targeted The Mona Lisa. And they're not just interstellar, they're Time Travelers! At least they're not Time Lords, though, right? This episode was cowritten by Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy guy, the Dirk Gently guy, the funny fucker who wrote great sci-fi. So this is a more fun than usual episode. Enjoy it!


Serial 7: The Leisure Hive
100 minutes

This is the first episode where a companion Bites The Big Mortal Thing. But not, like, forever. No, it's not the Time Lo--La--Lo...it's not even a humanoid, and it's a companion you've mostly been protected from, so it's not going to be as therapeutic for you as it was for fans at the time, but the episode starts with a BOOM!  And then, the vacationing Doctor and Romana (The Time L---Person) stumble into a Recreation Generator, which has a Very Unfortunate Side Effect for The Doctor.


Serial 8: Full Circle
100 minutes

It's time for Romana to go back to Gallifrey. Surely this means more hijinks with those High Collared Asshole Time Lords. Wait, this is The Wrong Planet, morons. This planet has way too many children on it. Kids are So Annoying. I'm so glad that all of The Doctor's companions have been grown ups since Screechy Susan and Vicki disappeared in season one.  Maybe the Doctor will actually get a male companion who is age appropriate to his----DOCTOR, ONE OF THOSE LITTLE SHITS HAS STOWED AWAY ON YOUR TARDIS. GET HIM OUT!!! GET HIM---Damn it.


Serial 9: State Of Decay
100 minutes

Stupid child companion. Stupid robotic dog companion that somehow got rebuilt since the explosion. Stupid Romana, still being stupid on the stupid TARDIS.  (Narrator leaves to kick rocks) This episode centers on a planet with medieval culture that seems out of place, and a group of bat gu---IS THIS A VAMPIRE EPISODE? (Narrator gnashes teeth. Kicks boulders.)


Serial 10: Warrior's Gate
100 minutes

I have to come clean. I've been hiding something from you. Remember how I told you I didn't include the season long story arc in season 16 because it was TOO LONG. Well, these last serials are actually a trilogy called The E-Space Trilogy.  It's a void between worlds kind of thing, spacey-wacey, sciency-wiency. And it serves to get Romana and the stupid dog Off The Goddamed TARDIS. But this kid appears to be sticking around. And...holy shit, we made it through an entire season without The Doctor regenerating. Pretttttty coooooool.

Episode 1: War Games Part 10
25 minutes

Much like last season, we start with a single short episode, as opposed to a serial. War Games was a ten episode epic about a battle for supremacy on alien planet where they have abducted Earthlings to, essentially, act as war reenactors from various periods of Earth history. It takes ForEVer. But in the tenth episode, we meet The Doctor's race, The Time Lords. And what a bunch of pretentious assholes they turn out to be. No wonder The Doctor doesn't hang out with them. After he calls on them for help, they not only send his companions back to where they came from, they force him to regenerate, and exile him to Earth. What a fester of shitbags.


Serial 2: Spearhead From Space
100 minutes

Imagine waking up with a new face, on a planet you know but aren't from, and all you want to do is fucken sleep it off, and some military jackwits who knew your old face drag you to their hospital. By the time you feel better there's some sort of invasion thing happening involving fucken mannequins. Hold on, this is ALSO the plot of the damned reboot from 2005 but with extra bonus military.  The Autons are such a ridiculous enemy, we surely won't ever see them again.


Serial 3: Terror Of The Autons
100 minutes

For fuck's sake. Autons again? And who the hell is The Master? Another damned Time Lord? An evil Time Lord? I mean, they all sort of suck, so what makes this guy eviler than the rest of them? Oh shit, is this guy also trapped on Earth now? Is this the point where the soundtrack would go Dun-dun-DUNNNNNNN?


Serial 4: Colony In Space
150 minutes

So The Doctor is the most competent Time Lords, and he has been banished to Earth, where he managed to trap another Time Lord. Ok. But now bad shit is going down somewhere and The Time Lords have no choice but to call up Earth and be like "Ohhhhh, hey Doctor, how is Earth? Yea? Wow, that totally sucks. Look, you're Still Grounded but mommy and daddy need you to go and fix this mining disaster that we just can't wrap our heads around. Ok? When you're done, you're going to have to go back to your room, but for now, enjoy the night of freedom. And....try not to die. LOVE YOU." And, of course, The fucken Master is going to show up in this shitshow, too. Time Lords are THE WORST.



Serial 5: The Time Monster
150 minutes

You know, you say he's exiled on Earth you Time Lord Assholes, but you do keep needing him to run errands for you, and Every Fucken Time, The goddamned Master shows up to try and foil him. How may times does The Master just hypnotise his way into shenanigans, only to have The Doctor foil them at the last minute, but allow him to escape. Well, this time it'll be totally differ---no, same thing again, huh? Ok.


Serial 6: The Three Doctors
100 minutes

Another damned Time Lord errand? Only this time, instead of The Master, it's some other Criminal Time Lord named Omega? This sounds like every other episode but with a slightly different villain. Only this one's in a mask instead of a goatee. What makes him so special? Oh Shit. You need not only the current Doctor, but the two previous versions of The Doctor to take him down. How the fuck is crotchety old due going to be helpful in this scenario? You know what, I'll just sit back and see how this works itself out.



Serial 7: Planet Of The Spiders
150 minutes

We haven't been paying a lot of attention to the companions in this season. There's The Brigadier, some military people, and there have been a couple of scientists helping out (attractive female scientists of course, this was the 1970s). Well now there's a journalist named Sarah Jane who will be around Quite A Bit More Frequently than most companions. Well, the pesky journalist, one of the pesky military types, and a rock sent by one of those pretty scientists lead The Doctor to a spider problem. A very complex spider problem, and Oh Shit, it's time to regenerate again.



Serial 8: Ark In Space
100 minutes

Yo. This show must involve actual time travelers because this new Doctor with his Huge-Ass Scarf is clearly starring in the movie Alien here. Only this came out Before Alien. Mind. Fucked. Only instead of those nightmare-inducing Xenomorphs it's...green bubble wrap? But it does eventually turn you into a giant insect. Fun!


Serial 9: Genesis Of The Daleks
150 minutes

The genocidal trash cans are back! Sort of. Wibbly-wobbly timey-wimeyness means we're back at the time The Daleks came into being. Man, their creator is cuh-ray-zee. But since we're back a the origin point for the race, surely The Doctor will just kill their creator before they come into being and we'll never have to see them again. That's obviously what's going to happen. Right?


Serial 10: Terror Of The Zygons
100 minutes

It's the Loch Ness fucken monster! And weird rubber chameleon aliens. They are Not Fucking Around. Let's wrap this season up with some good old fashion monster fighting and mistaken identity. And let's put aside UNIT (the military outfit that showed up seven times this season!) away for awhile.