Random Customer: "My girlfriend, like everyone else in the the world, is shipping Poe Dameron and Finn, and I'm like, why? Why can't two guys just be friends? And she says 'But they touch each others shoulders.' And I'm like, I touch people's shoulders all the time. That doesn't make me gay."
Me: "Right? It's not like they touched penises."
RC: "Hey, I've touched penises before. Don't label me. My friend said the shoulder thing is fine but Poe gave him his jacket, and he thought that was really gay, and I was like YOU gave me YOUR jacket once. And he was like "Yea, but that's because you were cold and my friend, not because it looked better on a guy I met, like twice.'"
Me: "Some guy who Saved His Life, who Thought He Was Dead. It's not like they just met in a bar and traded jackets."
RC: "Right! You get me. Finally, someone gets me."
Me: "Can I have your jacket?"