Two Ignant Fucks

​1.) Tonight at work, Mayk was working the lounge. He has a very slight accent. It's so slight that it's very noticable. Rare is the night that one of the tables doesn't ask him where he's from, and how to pronounce his name. That's completely understandable. Tonight when he told his table he was from Brazil (which he is) The Boss Hog Wannabe yucked it up and said "Braw-zeel? You from the jungle? Can you talk to the animals?"

¿¿¿Who does that??? What could possibly go through someone's head? I mean...I'll grant you there is the largest rainforest in the world in Brazil, but there are also cities, and rural areas, and...I mean...If some Brazilian asked me where I was from, and I said the U.S., I'd be astonished if they responded with "A-mare-ee-ka? You live in an igloo? Do you wrestle with polar bears?" Caus you know, Alaska is the biggest state in the union...

Mayk spent the rest of the night making monkey noises, and pointing at things.

2.) When Mayk and I were discussing some people's vast ignorance, I relayed the story of how some ignorant American once asked kattullus what language they spoke in Iceland, to which he replied: "Icelandic." The IA said (and I'm paraphrasing here): "No, for reals, what do you speak, English?"

So three people I work with overheard this conversation, and one of them asks, "So what do they speak in Iceland?" Icelandic. "Yea, right. They speak Dutch, moron." Well, I suppose some Icelandic people speak Dutch, just as some Americans speak Spanish, but the official language of Iceland is Icelandic. "Dude, your friend is fucking with you, they speak Dutch." You keep on believing that if it helps you sleep at night.
Current Mood:  just...I mean...how...
Current Music: "Until" -- Ayisha Knight
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Wed, Apr. 21st, 2004 05:21 pm (local)
kattullusdamn... I was hoping you wouldn't run into anyone who'd actually been to Iceland...

yeah... we speak Dutch, but we don't like to tell anyone, cuz, y'know, it's the ugliest language in the world. When any foreigners are around us we just babble some made up shit until they leave. The worst off are of course those who come to Iceland to try to learn the language... ooph... we have a special asylum just for them when they finally lose it. It's tough to look on... so we stick'em way out there in the sticks were we don't have to, so it all works out.

And actually, it happened to a friend of mine, petrakhov, and the conversation went like this:

What language do you speak in Iceland?
Icelandic
Yeah right! And in America we speak American.

I'll actually tell my friend about this so he can come over and give us the gospel :)
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Wed, Apr. 21st, 2004 05:45 pm (local)
insafemodeHe can only give us the gospel, if he does so in Dutch. Dutch being the official language of Duh.
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Fri, Apr. 23rd, 2004 05:41 am (local)
petrakhovÉg verð að viðurkenna að ég skil ekki alveg hvað er í gangi hérna. Misskildi gaurinn að eitthvað hefði komið fyrir þig í staðinn fyrir mig?


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Fri, Apr. 23rd, 2004 06:56 am (local)
kattullusjebb
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Sat, Apr. 24th, 2004 03:50 am (local)
akamuuAh, Dutch, the language of love, and Iceland. Oh how I wish I had a pair of wooden shoes to tramp tulips in.
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Thu, Apr. 22nd, 2004 05:39 am (local)
crabbitty: speaking to animalsso i am assuming Mayk carried on just enough conversation with "boss HOG wannabe" to serve his party and get them the f out of there. hence "yes HOG i can, I am speaking to you aren't I"?
The inability to speak to animals would lessen your ability to make tips, oui?