Like any true Patriots fan, I spent the night at Su's house watching the movie Pumpkin with her and Chance. I'm not sure how I felt about the movie. Deliberately awful writing. Some strange acting choices to say the least. And the car that for some reason exploded as it went over the hill??? Uhhh...yea.
Apart from our movie watching, Su and I got a chance to discuss our billion dollar ideas. Fuck fake tuna. The wave of the future in catfood is squirrel in a can. Imagine Fluffy prancing into the kitchen when he hears his favorite sound: the can opener. Then picture the delight in his face as a real live squirrel hops out of the can and around the kitchen leaving your little carnivore on a romp around the house before Fluffy gets his din din.
Another billion dollar idea: Buffy The Night Nurse
(Buffy, age twenty-four walks into the ER, throws her stethoscope and...that thing that takes your blood pressure...onto the body of a patient who begins screaming)
Carrie Weaver: (ignoring the patient): What the hell is going on here?
Buffy: Weaver, it's not fair. I just want to be a normal twenty-something, hanging out at Starbuck's, trolling the high school for hot jailbait, I --
Carrie Weaver: Buffy, I'm sorry. The Council didn't choose you arbitrarily. You are The Night Nurse. This is your destiny.
Buffy: (stabbing a pair of shears through the patient's heart) I know. (makes the patented Sarah Michelle Gellar pouty face) But it's not fair.
(Angel enters carrying a fourty year old man who bears a strong resemblance to him. He rolls the corpse of the other patient off the table, and plops the fresh body down)
Angel: Weaver. You've got to help him. I had to send my son back into one of those other dimension things again to help the ratings, and I'm afraid that while he was there he was attacked by a man whose family I killed back in 1845 when I was Angelus and --
Carrie Weaver: Jesus Fucki--
(Charisma Carpenter starts to enter, remembers she's on another television show, and walks back out)
Carrie Weaver: I wish Willow were here, she'd---
Angel: What is it with you whiny lesbo witches?
Carrie Weaver: Now you see here!!!
(Dr. Green enters in zombie makeup)
Dr. Green: Is there a problem here?
(Buffy stakes him)
Buffy: I hate vampire surgeons.
(cue opening theme music)
Current Mood: giggly
Leave a comment | 5 comments
Sat, Jan. 10th, 2004 10:32 pm (UTC)
akamuuThat's the problem keeping us from hitting the mainstream market. If anyone can come up with a low-cost solution, we'll cut them in on the profits.
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Sun, Jan. 11th, 2004 07:09 am (UTC)
just_jeff: i know this guy named schrodingerwho has some interesting theories about this...
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Sun, Jan. 11th, 2004 07:45 am (UTC)
happinesstogoLast summer, right before you arrived in Arizona, as a matter of fact I think it was the same day you arrived, my friend Scott and I rented Pumpkin on my recommendation and it turned out to be so awful that we had to stop it about 45 minutes or so into the movie. I was disappointed and embarrassed that I had chosen the film. I can't believe you made it through the whole thing.
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Sun, Jan. 11th, 2004 08:20 am (UTC)
akamuuBoth Su and I have wanted to see it ever since we saw the preview on Y Tu Mama Tambien. Both of us are pretty tolerant of warped movies, and Pumpkin was definitely warped.
God the acting was horrible. I imagine the director was going for the whole Election feel where quirky girl delivers lines awkwardly and everyone hails it as a cult classic.
Can you imagine a MST showing of that movie? Oooooooh.
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