Craigslist Dating Odyssey 2004

​The one online date I've gone on in five years is safely behind me (see previous entry). It certainly wasn't a horrorshow or anything, just a little bit Ewwww. I'll stil be hanging out with the guy because I do like him, it's just that liking him is as far as it will go. Today he tells me he's seen my ad on Craigslist. This gets me to wondering as to why he was looking at the rideshare section of the AZ Craigslist, so I ask him. He says that he's talking about an ad on the Boston M4M site.

Granted, I'm a little biased against Craigslist. It provided a near miraculous way for me to get to AZ, but when I needed it to help me get back home, where was it? Huh? That's right, locked on the f*n internet, completely ignoring me. It's a g-d enabler. "Did you have a good trip to AZ, Adam? Would you like to take a look at my romance section? Perhaps I could shove red hot skewers up your nose and plunge you into a bathtub of boiling water? Wouldn't that keep you nice and warm, Adam?"

At first I thought the post was eerily like my situation: same age, same lack of heating, in the general area where I live. I just hope I've never come across as that desperate. After perusing the other ads, I realized they're all pretty standard, you're bound to run into one that's relatively close to your description, and apparently no one has heat in this part of town.

I think I'll put Craigslist somewhere around the bottom of my dating resources, right in between personal referral from Michael Brown, and willing to suck cock for crack. I'll stick to more conventional methods like cruising slam venues and suicide prevention lines.
Current Mood:  cold
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Thu, Jan. 15th, 2004 03:11 pm (UTC)
theklute: I don't know - there's winners out there...Like this guy:

Horny for Str8/Bi Dick - m4m - 34 
Reply to: anon-22475564@craigslist.org

Hey guys, coming to town on business and looking to host some horny str8/bi guys who need some no strings head. I'm cleancut, white/latin, nice looking, 34, 5'7", 140, warm mouth. Very discrete and expect the same.

I mean, granted, it's from the "Casual Encounters" section, but I'm just under the assumption that if a gay white/latin was hungry for my str8 cock, the mouth was going to be warm.
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Thu, Jan. 15th, 2004 03:23 pm (UTC)
akamuu: Re: Warm MouthsYou think that's bad, this novella about what this guy wants was so specific, and (to me anyway) completely unrelatable, I had to e-mail him. During the course of the conversation, I asked if he had a picture, and he berated me about how unsafe that was. ??? You're willing to let some stranger come over to your house and fuck you up the ass at 4 o'clock in the morning, but you're too chickenshit to tell someone what you look like? I'm sure in his world someone like Bush is president and we're constantly threatening was against Midd...damn, I guess we're living in his world.

Still, I'll stick to the whole getting to know someone before I invite them over for sex routine. My mouth just isn't warm enough for Carigslist.
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Thu, Jan. 15th, 2004 05:16 pm (UTC)
mom_star: Re: Warm MouthsYesterday, someone sent me a Craigslist posting for a free older Saab (worth 1000, but it must go now!!!1!). 

Hmm.

What are the odds it's full of dead hookers? 

Dead hookers who NEVER SENT A PICTURE!!!

Ah well, it's how we found our sweet apartment, with the leaky windows, mysterious January flies, & evil old lady neighbor.
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Thu, Jan. 15th, 2004 05:23 pm (UTC)
akamuu: Don't Tell J*MeYou found your sweet apartment in a trunk full of dead hookers who never sent a picture? Wait, now I got it.

I'd almost be up for a free Saab if I didn't know that it came with a terrible curse. I imagine you can't turn the radio off and all it ever plays is Janis Joplin's "Mercedes Benz."
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Thu, Jan. 15th, 2004 05:48 pm (UTC)
mom_star: Re: Don't Tell J*MeLack of specificity will be the specific death of me. Specifically.

The radio -- maybe it plays "Bitchin' Camaro," or Huey Lews & The News' "I Wanna New Drug." The only reason I threw that in is because until LAST WEEK I thought he was singing: I wanna new truck. I am such a l0z3r.


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Thu, Jan. 15th, 2004 06:01 pm (UTC)
akamuu: Re: Don't Tell J*MeAt least it won't be playing Weird Al Yankovich's "I Want a New Duck." That would be too much.

0h, o |\| |_ `/ |_ 0 0 ~/_ 3 r~/_ \/\/r!+3 
! |\| |_33+.
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Thu, Jan. 15th, 2004 06:09 pm (UTC)
mom_star: Re: Don't Tell J*MeWell obviously, that's why I wrote 10z3r, you hack.

:P

ps- Would your fist by any chance be up the ass of a duck? I was brain-damaged by a guerrilla poet, and fist fucking dead ducks is something I bring up whenever anyone else brings up: ducks, dead hookers, or 133+.
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Thu, Jan. 15th, 2004 06:12 pm (UTC)
akamuu: Re: Don't Tell J*MeNo, but the same guerilla poet once gave me his expired YMCA card. I never figured out what that meant.

Perhaps it was meant to make up for the fact that my first night hosting The Daily Grind on my own, he broke the damn door trying to puctuate the end of the Duck's Ass poem.

He is also the reason I don't go in skyscraper bathrooms.