Bah! Crochety Slam Review (Sans Crotch)

Mon, Jun. 5th, 2006, 12:53 am  
Bah! Corchety Slam Review (Sans Crotch)Worcester's judges tonight sure loved them some misogony and stand up comedy. I'm shocked that their team came out as good as it did (and it is a good team), given how across the board terrible the judging was. We had judges who flirted during people's poems, judges who shot dirty looks at poets during the slam, and one judge who, at the end of the night, said loudly to her friend "I hate poetry, I don't even know why I'm here." Apparently, to try and fuck up what was a generally good slam, that probably would have been spectacular without her crap judging (and with pretty much the same end results for the team)). Kudos to sapienza for handing out low scores for the night.

Despite pulling for Sean, who got totally shafted in the first and second rounds, the biggest disappointment for me was seeing Nick Davis do the only absolutely brilliant poem of the night about pigeons and Beck, getting a fairly low score and not making the team, while he got a higher score with his ode to bad hygeine. The higher scoring poem was funny, and a great read of the room, but I really wanted the Beck/pigeon poem to get him on the team. The mostly female judges, however, would rather hear "I only cheat on girls who deserve it", "I'm an asshole" yadda yadda soul yadda essence yadda soul cliche cliche misogyny yadda yadda crapfest "poem". Ehhh, it's just a slam. I just hold higher expectations for Worcester. 

That said, morthsha & bad_gary totally rocked the room all night, and urbanitis did a gutsy new piece that I didn't particularly like, even before he dropped it, but it was a ballsy choice, and he's got so many poems that I wish I wrote, that I'm just glad to see him on the team. I still feel bad about knocking him out last year. I was also bummed that theryk & the artist formerly known as Giggelz (sp?). But neither of them read the room well. That, or they both showed some artistic integrity and did the poems they wanted to do.

Also good to see the Worcester regulars & hot_rod_poet. Been too long. Sorry I was in such a crabby mood.
Link
 Leave a comment | 14 comments
Mon, Jun. 5th, 2006 07:55 am (local)
therykI'm having a little trouble reading your sentence. Still bummed about last night. I thought I did well, but the judges didn't think so. I just don't get what I did wrong...
Link
Thread - Delete - Spam - Screen - Freeze - Track This - Reply
Select: 
Mon, Jun. 5th, 2006 09:43 pm (local)
akamuuTHe sentence should be I was also bummed that theryk & the artist formerly known as Giggelz didn't score higher.
Link
Parent - Thread - Edit - Delete - Screen - Freeze - Track This - Reply
Select: 
Mon, Jun. 5th, 2006 09:16 am (local)
hot_rod_poet: it's like we went to two different shows...Were there other "misogynist" poems besides the last one? I put it in quotes because, though I think there are some misogynist (or a least very demeaning, woman-negative) lines, that's not the focus of the poem. I didn't register any other pieces that hit that way...maybe I missed them.

I agree--sapienza was a kick-ass, consistent judge, and I told her so afterwards, just so she didn't think my heckling was serious. And the pigeon poem was the most brilliant thing of the night. He only missed 4th by 0.1.

And a judge who hates poetry is a great judge. A judges who flirts during poems is annoying, but if the poets are boring her, they aren't connecting with her. Slam is supposed to connect with the audience. Maybe I'm too used to weekly bar slams where the judges are half-wasted or had to get cajoled into judging, and the scores don't really matter, but they didn't seem all that bad to me. I didn't necessarily agree with them, but they were consistent.

That slam, as most are, was won and lost in the first round. There was a 1.3 point separation between 4th and 5th after that round, and those top 4 were the four who made the team, though Nick's heroics nearly changed that. If people wanted to win, they should have known what to do after the first three poems--after morthsha & badgary got big scores for Funny-With-A-Point, it was obvious that it was going to be an entertainment night, not Deep Poetry night. theryk's second piece was my second-favorite piece of the night, but as soon as it was over, I said to Alex (paraphrase) That was a great poem. It's now going to get screwed by the judges, and unfortunately, I was right.

Seems like, this year more than others, all the big shows have favored funny, entertaining material over the more heartfelt or intricate stuff.

Link
Thread - Delete - Spam - Screen - Freeze - Track This - Reply
Select: 
Mon, Jun. 5th, 2006 02:06 pm (local)
urbanitus: Re: it's like we went to two different shows...Seems like, this year more than others, all the big shows have favored funny, entertaining material over the more heartfelt or intricate stuff.

It would happen the year I was wanting to do all heartfelt and intricate...
Link
Parent - Thread - Delete - Spam - Screen - Freeze - Track This - Reply
Select: 
Mon, Jun. 5th, 2006 02:16 pm (local)
hot_rod_poet: Re: it's like we went to two different shows...well, you didn't have to bust out the Revolution in the Kitchen piece, so you didn't go ALL the way to the other end of the heartfelt-to-entertainment continuum.
Link
Parent - Thread - Delete - Spam - Screen - Freeze - Track This - Reply
Select: 
Tue, Jun. 6th, 2006 12:42 am (local)
urbanitus: Re: it's like we went to two different shows...Hey! That's one of my most serious-minded pieces. It's an allegory referencing the rise of the Zulus against the British.
Link
Parent - Thread - Delete - Spam - Screen - Freeze - Track This - Reply
Select: 
Tue, Jun. 6th, 2006 01:17 am (local)
hot_rod_poet: Re: it's like we went to two different shows...And pepto bismol is the geneva convention. Sure.

That guy playing guitar with the banjo pegs is friggin' cool. It has led me to an hour of YouTube and Myspace, starting with him, and then going off on random internet insomniac tangents.
Link
Parent - Thread - Delete - Spam - Screen - Freeze - Track This - Reply
Select: 
Mon, Jun. 5th, 2006 10:19 pm (local)
akamuuBe proud of the fact that you have the range to do both. Most slammers don't.
Link
Parent - Thread - Edit - Delete - Screen - Freeze - Track This - Reply
Select: 
Tue, Jun. 6th, 2006 12:39 am (local)
urbanitusI think I might be. When I first started slam, I figured if I couldn't be good, I could at least be loud. Then it was weird. Now, perhaps its: If I can't be good, I can at least be diverse.
Link
Parent - Thread - Delete - Spam - Screen - Freeze - Track This - Reply
Select: 
Mon, Jun. 5th, 2006 10:17 pm (local)
akamuu: Nah, the show was the same, you just have bad...I mean different tasteYou didn't find the rest of the poem misogynistic? Hmmm. We appear to get different gists in poems. You find Hagan's "rip your tits off" line to be misogynistic, whereas I find it to be poorly conceptualized feminism. Overly violent. Unnecessarily shock/schlocky, but not misogynistic. Ehhh. 

Mainly, I've heard Bobby Gibbs for the last couple of years, and never heard anything that I didn't find either tired or distasteful or both. His "I used to be an asshole poem" just irritated me. His writing is very reminiscent of Christopher Johnson when Christopher Johnson used to suck. So, there's hope at least. Christopher is now one of the better slam writers in New England. As for his "I'm writing a poem about..." poem? Here's my standard response "Dear Poet writing about how you're going to write a poem. Please shut up and come back when you've succeeded in writing these poems. If they're half as good as you think they'll be, I can't wait to hear them."

I blame Taylor Mali and Billy Collins for the popularity of this phenomenon..

I agree with your "go funny if you wanted to win" sentiment. I knew which 3 poems Ryk wanted to do, and as much as I like the new poem, I was crossing my fingers whispering "Nietzsche", hoping he'd go funny. He didn't. He did the poem he wanted to do, and he didn't make the team. Oh, well. That saddens me, but it doesn't ruin my night.

I disagree with your "a judge who hates poetry is a good judge." Sorry, a judge who hates poety when they walk into a venue and is a good judge in theory, but they rarely have an epiphany leading them to learn to enjoy poetry. Usually they leave hating poetry even more. They don't have a good time, the poets don't have a good time being judged by them. Basically it encourages hack writers. Do you really think that's a good thing? It's a poetry slam. If you don't like/get poetry, go to a hip-hop club or an 80's karaoke night, or a movie. See Sean's Journal for the exact quote from the girl.

If the judge in question had started talking during the middle of Sean's poem, I would have agreed with your statement that he should have held her attention. She didn't. She began talking before he took the stage. She did the same thing for one of Ryk's poems. She was a poor choice as a judge. Granted, whoever picked the judges probably didn't know that when (s)he was choosing.

Here's another thing. There seems to be a movement in slam hosts to make judges "diverse" as possible. If you have a room that's 80% white men, is it really necessary to have three female judges? Simone does it to. If there's one black audience member at The Cantab, they're a judge. I get it, I just don't like it. I think judges should be representative of the audience. The Lizard Lounge doesn't pick the two white people in the audience to judge a slam, and they shouldn't.

That said, I much prefer the Berkley CA way of picking judges. Everyone who walks into the slam gets one half of one of those double sided carnival tickets, they fill a bowl with the other halves. Voila, judges who are actually chosen randomly. Charles Ellik should teach a seminar on how to run a poetry slam.

Link
Parent - Thread - Edit - Delete - Screen - Freeze - Track This - Reply
Select: 
Mon, Jun. 5th, 2006 10:22 pm (local)
akamuu: Ugh. Typos.I really need to edit comments before I post them.
Link
Parent - Thread - Edit - Delete - Screen - Freeze - Track This - Reply
Select: 
Mon, Jun. 5th, 2006 11:59 pm (local)
hot_rod_poet: Re: Nah, the show was the same, you just have bad...I mean different tasteYou didn't find the rest of the poem misogynistic?
Nope--I re-read it last night when I got home, after so many people had a bad reaction to it (and I've heard it a couple times before). It's about being afraid of getting hurt again, but still going back to somebody who you feel safe with and love, in spite of yourself. It's not empowering to women--he admits that his way of reacting is hard and cold, and that he doesn't want her to trust him, but not-postive is not necessarily demeaning. If anything he damns himself and apologizes to her, that one button-pushing line excepted.

Mainly, I've heard Bobby Gibbs for the last couple of years, and never heard anything that I didn't find either tired or distasteful or both.
Bobby's work is not overly original, but there is a place for what he has to say, and I respect the fact that he does really well without stage theatrics, just letting the words do their thing.

As for ars poetica--I dislike it too, but it seems to be an unavoidable thing in this slam game. I can't diss on it too bad, or I'd be a hypocrite (I've won too many slams with my silly Spit This piece, which is a poem about poetry that makes fun of poems about poetry).

You find Hagan's "rip your tits off" line to be misogynistic
Nope--I think that particular line is just gross and violent. I have no further public comment on this topic. 

Sorry, a judge who hates poety when they walk into a venue and is a good judge in theory, but they rarely have an epiphany leading them to learn to enjoy poetry.
I don't care if they learn to enjoy Poetry. I just want them to enjoy MY poetry more than the other people's. Would they rather eat a pound of moose shit or a pound of ferret shit? I agree--it does often encourage hackery, though (the judging, not the shit-eating)*. Most people who hate poetry watch too much television, and it takes sound bite reflections of crappy television to penetrate their softened brains. Occupational hazard. Unless you have all celebrity judges (which encourages cliqueyness), you roll the dice on shitty judges. I suppose you could quiz the judges better beforehand, too.

Wouldn't it be cool if the judges could get judged by the audience after the first two rounds? Two judges get fired between rounds. Loudest booing selects them. It'd probably encourage score creep, unfortunately.

Everyone who walks into the slam gets one half of one of those double sided carnival tickets, they fill a bowl with the other halves.
That'd never work. Simone would have to draw about sixty tickets before she found five people who had actually stayed in the venue to see the slam. Number 47? No? Number 18? No? Number 79? No? Shit, it's almost 12:30 and we haven't started yet...Number 3? 91? 21? 21! Yes! Only four more! Number 66? 13?
Link
Parent - Thread - Delete - Spam - Screen - Freeze - Track This - Reply
Select: 
Tue, Jun. 6th, 2006 12:11 am (local)
hot_rod_poet*I was going to do a footnoted reply, but that's really lame and it was a stupid point anyway.
Link
Parent - Thread - Delete - Spam - Screen - Freeze - Track This - Reply
Select: 
Tue, Apr. 1st, 2008 10:11 am (local)
stefan11If you get those msgs --

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, FRIEND!!